The Chicken Zombies

Chapter 9-- Oh, no.

Shakira and Dolph had been digging so hard, their arms just about fallen off.

Shakira pushed a sweaty stand of blonde hair off of her forehead. "Remind me just where Dante was going to get the really big hose?"

Dolph panted, leaning against his shovel. "I think she said something about a lot of hula hoops?"

Shakira shook her head. "She really is the dumbest person I've ever met."

"Yeah, she's not very bright."

Shakira glanced at him. "Hey, that's my best friend you're talking about. Be nice."

"Oh, I'm sorry, I was just agreeing with you-"

"MINIONS," A voice called in the distance. "SEIZE THEM!"

Shakira and Dolph looked up to see all of their brainwashed classmates staring at them less than a block away, led by none other than Ronaldo Rosenpinis.

"RUN!" the two teens yelled at the same time, looking for a way to escape the hole they'd quite literally dug themselves into. (Bah-dum tssss.)

"Agh!" Dolph cried. "It's too deep."

Shakira snorted. "That's what she said."

They both chuckled before realizing they were about to die.

"Here, I'll give you a boost, then you pull me up," Dolph said.

Shakira nodded. "I'll try. But are you sure you can lift-"

"Shakira, we don't have much time. I just need you to trust that I'm really strong. Like, as strong as a WWE wrestler."

Wow, arrogant much?  thought Shakira. But even so, she stepped into Dolph's cupped hands. He lifted her with, in fact, the strength of a WWE wrestler. Soon she was standing on the ground above.

She reached back in for Dolph as she wondered why they hadn't just brought a ladder.

"Shakira!" Dolph called. The minions were gaining on them now. "Just go! Leave me here!"

"I can't!"

"GO!"

"STOP YELLING AT ME I DON'T LIKE BEING YELLED AT!"

"THEN GO!"

"OKAY!" Shakira took off towards the stolen SUV.

"SHAKIRA WAIT!"

"WHAT?" 

Dolph took a breath. "I'M GAY. JUST REALIZED THAT I AM NOT ATTRACTED TO YOU AT ALL. BUT WE CAN STILL BE FRIENDS. NOW RUN!".

That kind of bummed Shakira out, but she kept running

The minions were too close now for them to really escape, so Dolph just stayed in the hole and threw dirt all over himself. Dante was still nowhere to be found with the bunch of hula hoops or whatever the heck she had been talking about.

Shakira threw herself into the SUV and started it up (Dante had somehow made a key. This is not just a plothole.)

Dante was still nowhere to be found. However, Shakira was going 500 MPH down the road when she found Dante laying down in the grass, with twenty million hula hoops and a gallon of Elmer's glue surrounding her.

"DANTE WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" Shakira yelled at Dante. Dante quickly jumped up and threw some hula hoops in the air.

"Oh, I took a nap!" Dante shrugged.

"GET IN THE CAR NOW, WE HAVE TO SAVE DOLPH!" Shakira screamed.

"Orrrrr we won't save him and we'll let the minions kill him. HAHAHA." Dante smirked.

"DANTE THAT IS THE LOVE OF MY LIFE YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT. Nevermind, he's GAY." She gasped. "Did I just say that out loud?"

"Yep."

"Just get in the ding-dang car."

Dante groaned. "Ugh, fine."

She snatched up the twenty million hula hoops and the gallon of Elmer's glue and chucked it all in the trunk.

Shakira glanced out the rearview mirror to see some of the minions sprinting towards them, led by Patricia Baywinkle.

"HURRY, THEY'RE GAINING ON US!" shouted Shakira from the driver's seat.

"Excuse me ma'am but I don't appreciate your tone," Dante murmured as she tried cramming all the hula hoops into the SUV.

Shakira panickedly looked over her shoulder to see that the minions were very close now. "HARLON GET IN THE *@#$!@# CAR RIGHT NOW!"

"Wha-oh. AHHHHHH!" Dante screamed as she threw herself in the trunk with all the hula hoops. Shakira slammed on the gas with her whole body weight.

NEEEERRroooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMM.

Was what the stolen red SUV sounded like.

Harlon-sorry, Dante- pried herself to the front seat. "WHO THE HECK IS HARLON?"
"I DON'T EVEN KNOW."

Then they both screamed, because someone had jumped atop the car once again.