Connected

i hate to admit

I didn't realize how long I had been typing until a mug was set onto the table and into my vision. I looked up at the Captain, who had his own mug.

"Careful, it's still pretty warm." He warned.

I nodded then stared at the screen in front of me. Some things looked like they made sense but others seemed like just mush pushed together. I sighed and started deleting sections.

The Captain sat down next to me watching as I deleted a line of text then rewrote it, before deleting it all over again. I could hear him blowing on the coffee trying to cool it down.

"No good?"

I shrugged. "Some of it looks ok. But there are sections that are completely unusable. Like here."

I pointed to the screen and he leaned forward into my peripheral vision, to get a closer look. "The basic structure of the command is fine, but the actual command itself is nonsense."

He took a sip of his coffee and I noticed his face parallel to mine. Particularly his lips directly in line with my eyes. "So, what does that mean for you?"

I swallowed. "Umm, well... it means that the basics are still there, but that I will need to be super precise with the commands that I enter in to make sure that they work the way they need to work. There might also be older commands that I am more familiar with that may be a good work around, but take longer to write."

My eyes drifted up to look at Jeongin on the couch. His head had fallen to the side, and the book he had been reading was open in his lap. Then I looked down at Seungmin who had curled up into a ball. I could hear his steady rhythmic breathing whoosh in and out of his slightly open mouth.

I cleared my throat and turned to look back at the Captain. His eyes were floating across the different lines of script on the screen and he took another sip. His adam's apple bobbed as he swallowed and I turned back to the screen before he caught me staring.

What happened to the line I was supposed to be drawing?

"How long has it been since you created anything like this?" He picked up my cup and handed it directly to me.

I took a sip then looked down into the dark liquid and let the heat seep into my hands. "The last bit of heavy coding was about 5 years ago. But I pick up a C++ book or magazine every now and then just to keep up with it. Even sat in on a lecture a couple months ago."

"Were you studying it before 5 years ago? Or was it all kind of sudden?" He leaned back slightly and I adjusted my legs on the floor, thankful that he was now out of my peripheral vision.

I took another sip of coffee. "I started in middle school and kind of continued on my own once those classes ended. The pace I set for myself was a bit more rigorous anyway." I thought back to the various discussions with professors and teachers. Memories of contests and roboting classes making me smile slightly.

"What did your parents think?"

I turned to look directly at him, almost spilling my coffee on his leg. My smile completely vanishing from my face. "What?"

He stopped mid-sip. "Umm, your parents. What did they think about you continuing on your own?" He lowered his drink, clearly catching the shift in my own tone.

"Oh." I turned back around. "They were supportive at first."

"Why at first?" He leaned back forward and placed his own cup on the table in front of him. He was purposefully creating time for me to respond, but I felt my tongue get heavy.