Connected

The Beginning

I had felt bad for waking the boys up after the hour was over, but they had to return. I hugged each one individually and then gave them both a hug together. I grabbed the back of their shirts holding on tight, and felt my throat constrict as I tried not to cry.

"Be good. Both of you."

When I finally let them go, Jeongin's chin was trembling. A stray tear had fallen down his cheek and I wiped it away. Seungmin was busy looking the other way.

"Look after each other, please." They both nodded in response.

I pulled my shoes and they followed suit. I unlocked the door and led them down the stairs outside to the edge of the apartment parking lot. I halted at the edge, knowing that if I kept walking, I wouldn't stop.

The boys stopped at the edge too. I motioned for both of them to continue without me. I bit my bottom lip when I heard Jeongin let out a sob.

I grabbed his hand and Seungmin's and put them together. "Go on," I managed to choke out.

They began walking down the street, not daring to turn around. Those two always seemed to try to put on a brave face even when they wore their feelings on their sleeves.

The moment they rounded the corner I could feel the tears streaming down my face. But I didn't dare let any sound escape from my mouth.

Climbing back up the stairs was proving to be a bit difficult as tears clouded my vision. I stumbled a bit getting up to my floor, and I swayed a bit walking the landing before I stood in front of my door.

The tears came faster and my voice cracked as I opened the door. I could still see the divots in the futon from where we had all sat just moments ago. I went and laid down on it, trying to think back to moments ago when we had been together, but all I succeeded in doing was crying myself to sleep.

I woke up early the next morning with puffy eyes and an immense feeling of loss. I dragged myself up off of the futon and went to shower and change. Today I wore jeans and a t-shirt, something comfortable that I could run in.

I redid my hair, ensuring that the clip was secured. Then I spent the rest of the morning throwing all of my possessions into a single moving box. Someone would be by later to pick it up. Seungmin and Jeongin would have first say about what to do with everything.

Around 2, I locked up my apartment for the last time and headed over to Hyunjin and Felix's. The walk was pleasant and calming. It felt nice to be out and to finally be done with everything.

When I arrived at Felix's place he opened the door almost immediately. "Finally... whoa, what happened to you?" He leaned on the door.

"Is it that bad?"

"Do you really want me to answer that?" He motioned me inside.

"No, not really."

"You're really lucky. I don't think we ate all of the brownies." I walked into the kitchens and I followed after removing my shoes.

Felix was taking the lid off of a container and held it out to me. I grabbed two. "Thanks."

"Intense paper?"

"You have no idea. I was up so late last night working on it." I took a bite.

"When do you turn it in? Then you can go back to normal."

"Next week. That's why I really appreciate the extra time from Hyunjin. My time isn't enough to get everything completed with the amount of research that I need to have."

"I heard my name." Hyunjin appeared from around the corner and stood next to me.

"Yup." I took another bite. "I was just saying I appreciate you giving up some of your time."