Concealed

#0015

"What?! Again?!" Y/n shouted angrily as the screen flashed "loser" over and over again. "There's no way, you're cheating!" Y/n whined crossing her arms. Levi noticed the controller still in her hand and laughed. "Mine was on the complicated controls, yours was on auto shoot." Leviathan laughed. "Auto shoot?" Y/n asked uncrossing her arms. "Look, go to your settings." Leviathan instructed pointing at the far right corner. The screen was split and Y/n wouldn't give him the controller. He had no other choice. Sighing Levi made her navigate to the gameplay settings.

"Look, yours is on auto shoot." Levi said. Y/n looked and sure enough it was. "The hell was yours on then?" Y/n questioned seemingly less angry and more playful. "Mine was on the box on the left of that one. Advanced controls." He smiled slyly at Y/n. Y/n raised an eyebrow. "Um, so what does that have to do with anything..?" If Leviathan was being honest, he just wanted to show off to his idol. But Y/n didn't seem to be too impressed by it. "W-well you know. The more advanced the controls the less it means I'm cheating." Leviathan explained hurriedly hoping Y/n wouldn't notice his lie. The demon sighed and set her controller down on her lap.

Leviathan remembered Satan was talking to him about his memories, and the specific memory of Lucifer loving Y/n. "Hey, did you ever, you know.." Leviathan started logging out of the game and turning his TV off. "Did you ever like Lucifer romantically?" Leviathan asked. Y/n turned to him with a confused look on her face. "No?" She replied quickly. "H-Hey where did that come from?" Y/n questioned standing up from the floor. Crossing her arms she looked down at Levi. "Is he plotting something?" Y/n muttered. Leviathan got up and waved his arms frantically. "N-No! It was just a genuine question, you know.." Levi's voice trailed off. He noticed that after what had happened with Lucifer Y/n was always on edge about him or didn't want to talk about him.

"You don't have to be so paranoid." Leviathan smiled putting a hand awkwardly on her shoulder. Y/n looked at the floor. "It's true. I did see him as someone I wanted to protect." The demon began looking at the floor as she held her arm with her right hand. "But I never loved him romantically. It's hard for me to think of him as someone who I could spend the rest of my life with after everything." Y/n's chest tightened as she backed away making Levi's arm fall off her shoulder. Y/n held her hand to her chest and looked at Levi. "Lucifer is part of the reason I can't return to her." She blurted out.

"I'll never return to who I was. It's just impossible. Why did everything have to go and change? Sometimes I think I regret my decision." Y/n turned her attention back to the floor. "I fought for the people I loved. I did. So why is it that I'm not allowed to be happy even after everything?" Leviathan gave her a sad look. "Mystery x was just a fake version of the demon who was once an angel. What am I even trying to reach at this point?" A knot began to form in Y/n's throat. "You want to be happy." Leviathan replied. Y/n's lips began to tremble as she could no longer form words. "You know, the more I think about it the more you remind me of myself. Back in the celestial realm I wasn't anything special. I didn't have a passion for video games or anime, I wasn't an otaku. I was just a free loader." Leviathan slowly walked up to her.

"But unlike me, you had a passion back then. Even though it's a bit different, I think I understand how you feel. You thought that maybe if the circumstances were different you'd be someone better. But it just slapped you in the face didn't it?" Levi asked. Levi put a hand hesitantly on Y/n's head. For the first time, Levi saw her as someone who was more than just a friend or an idol. "It doesn't matter what you would have picked. One way or the other, you'd still be the same." Leviathan sighed. Y/n's vision was finally opened. In the back of her mind, she knew that if she hadn't fought she still would have regretted it. The person she was desperately trying to reach was long gone. It was only a fake. A version of her she created to suppress the emotions that overflowed.

"I was just lying to myself all along huh?" Y/n cried as she refused to look up.

I think, deep down I already knew. I became so entangled in the lie that I started to believe it was true.

"I'm sorry for dragging you around all the time Leviathan." Y/n muttered feeling his hand on her head. "It's not like I'm here with you against my will." Leviathan smiled smoothly moving his hand to her back and pushing her into him. Y/n only stood there. She was desperately trying to hold back her crying, so much she couldn't hug him back. But this time, Leviathan didn't back away. He let her cry into him even if he wasn't receiving a hug.

Even if I do regret fighting for Lucifer, I don't regret ever meeting you, Leviathan.