'don't give a fuck' attitude. / tyler joseph | ✓

seven.

"I can't believe my own mother fucking kicked me out," I said, a tear dripping down my cheek. Tyler leaned forward, wiping it off. Tyler and I got to his house probably over ten minutes ago, but haven't got out of the car. I didn't want his mom to think i'm mentally unstable when i've only known her for such a short time. Not a good way to leave a good impression. 

"I know, I can't believe it either, but it's okay," he said, grabbing my and pulling me into his chest. 

"I hate that i'm just barging in on your family like this," I told him, turning my head in the crook on his neck. 

"Don't be, now come on, I need to ask my mom," Tyler said, making the sick feeling in my stomach get worse. I left my bags in the car, just in case his mom says no, and I wouldn't have to do the walk of shame back to the car with my bags. Tyler wrapped his arm around my shoulders, hugging me into his side, making me feel more protected. Tyler walked up to the door, taking his arm away to open the door. His mom instantly beamed a huge smile, making me feel a little better, but not enough to rid the annoying butterflies in my stomach.

"Hello, Quinn, nice to see you again!" she cheered from the kitchen, Madison standing in the distance, most likely helping her make dinner. Tyler walked into the kitchen, smiling at his mother. 

"Hey, mom?" Tyler started, smiling at his mother with a mischievous smile. She looked over at him, rolling her eyes.

"What do you want, Tyler?" she said with a smile.

"Umm, Quinn's mom kicked her out of the house, can she please stay with us?"

And with that, her smile faded, and she looked at me. I ducked my head, biting my lip so I wouldn't start crying again.

"Oh, honey, Why did she kick you out?" she turned to me, sympathetically and looking at me with soft eyes. I looked up at her, and bit the inside of my cheek. I really didn't want to cry in front of her. She was really nice and all, but I  hate crying in front of people. It makes me feel weak. 

"My mom has always been abusive, and has always had a problem with alcoholism. She's been getting a lot worse lately and it makes her more violent, so I try to get out of the house as much as possible, and she got sick of me and just kicked me out," I said shrugging, a single tear rolling down my cheek. I reached my hand up, wiping it off. 

"Oh, sweetie, of course you can stay here!" she said, leaning forward and giving me a big hug. 

"Thank you, so much," I said into her ear. I looked back at Madison who smiled at me and went back to stirring. Tyler smiled at me, pulling my back into him. He smiled at his mom as I laid my back against his chest, feeling kind of awkward in front of his mom. I got up, pulling him up. 

"We'll be right back, we have to go get her bags from the car," Tyler said, spinning around and giggling as I poked his sides to get him out the door. He smiled down at me as he opened the door and let me out first before he walked out with me. 

"Thank, God, your mom is amazing," I spoke up as I got my suitcase full of my sketchbooks and just close items from the car.

"Yeah, she's amazing," he said, smiling to himself. 

"I don't doubt that for one moment," I said, also smiling to myself. Ty grabbed my duffle bag, putting it over his shoulder and carrying it to the house. I opened the door for him this time, walking in the house and  smiling at his mom before walking up the stairs and to Tyler's room. His room that smelled distinctly like his cologne, which I loved. Tyler looked over at me once he set my duffle bag down. I felt the soft black fabric slide down my shoulder as I straightened my back from leaning over and setting down my suitcase. 

"Now," Tyler started, giving me a smirk, "it's time to get my shirt back," he said, stepping towards me slowly. 

"Nope," I said, popping the 'p' and shaking my head. I crossed my arms over my chest in an act of resistance. He smiled, biting his lip before pulling me to the plush carpet by my shoulders. He straddled my stomach, his hands placed to the ground on either side of my head. He tugged at the bottom of the shirt as I giggled. I quickly pulled my arms inside the shirt, only esposing my hands through the arm holes. 

"Gimme," he chuckled out.

"But Tyler," I whined, "i'm a dinosaur."

Tyler stopped tickling me and pulled at the shirt for a moment, getting off my stomach and lying on the ground next to me. 

"You're lovely," he whispered to me, feeling his breath hit my face. Making me realize, only then, how close we really were. 

"I don't think so," I said, quirking my lip up and shaking my head.

"I will make you believe you are lovely," he whispered back, smiling at me. 

Even now, I didn't know why we were whispering. But, the words he said were ones that you can only imagine being whispered. He smiled at me, his lips curving into a smile, a perfect one. 

"I can't thank you enough," I whispered to him, smiling at him. 

"You can thank me with two things," he said, waving two fingers in the air. 

"And what are those two things?" I asked him.

"Show me your drawings," he said, "and believe you are lovely." 

I smiled, getting up, going to my suitcase and unzipping it. The little black book on top. The most violent ones of them all. I took it out, running my fingers down the black wire spine of the book. 

"Are you sure you want me to let you in this deep, Tyler?" I asked, not looking up at him. 

"I am positive," he responded, his eyes yanking mine up to look at him. I sat back down in front of him, opening the cover of it. I saw the dark black scribbles. It would look like scribbles to anyone else looking at the drawing. But not me. I turned the book to him, and Tyler's calm expression stayed the same. He took the book, looking at the photo. 

"Your demons," he whispered, looking up at me with a knowing look. I looked down at my hands, messing with them nervously. 

"Yeah," I whispered, not looking up at he turned to the next page. And the next. And the next. His looks all staying the same until he came upon one. My favorite drawing i've ever done. The drawing described what I felt at the time, hurt, my demons taking over. At the time, I felt lost. So I decided to draw. Half my face, crying, tears on my cheeks, sad eyes. And the other half a dark skull, also known as one of my demons. It had an evil feel to it. And that is exactly what it was, evil. 

"Wow," he mumbled, looking at the drawing and looking up at me.

"That one is my favorite," I told him, looking up at him for only a split second.

"Yeah, it's amazing."

The detail in that photo was some of the best i'd done, and I would be proud of it, if it wasn't for what it was of and what it was about. Tyler closed the book and without me paying attention, leaned forward and engulfed me in a big heart-warming hug. Making my body feel warm and fuzzy. I put my face in his chest, smiling into it as if it were a mirror. 

"Thank you," I whispered. I looked up at him, his face was just so caring and just perfect. 

I'm just glad I can see beauty in something, even if it isn't myself.

***

first author's note? *gasp*

hope you are all liking this! :3