haunted

chapter 21

Arabella's pov:

Why were we being so awkward? Sure, we had been in tons of situations in the past year where things had been pretty tense between us, but it had never been awkward before this silent car journey. He looked so nervous, like he wanted to say something but was to scared to do so.

"Can I play some music?" I ask, to try and interrupt the silence. He hums in agreement but refuses to look at me.

I put on some Taylor Swift, which evokes a slight smile on his face which quickly disappears.

Okay. This morning may have been a bit weird with me storming off again, but after I went on a run and had a cold shower I calmed down and talked it out with my Aunt. It can't be that, he was used to my complicated emotions by now. So that must mean this wasn't about me? Something must have happened during the day today.

But what? Ugh. This shouldn't frustrate me so much that I didn't know what was going on inside of his head.

But I was in love with him so of course it did.

It just freaked me out that he knew everything about me and my life but he was still keeping secrets. I feel so freaking vulnerable.

But I don't want to pressure him and make him tell me. If he wanted to, he would of already, right?

I don't know. This stupid boy is completely confusing me. One minute we are great and the next he is being all awkward with me.

The slow journey eventually comes to an end and we pull into the car park of the ice rink. He stops the car and is about to step out, but I stop him.

"Nathan Jones, don't you dare step out of this car." I demand, he turns back to me surprised.

"What?"

"What? I don't know, maybe I want to know what is going on with you." I tell him.

"Nothing is going on with me." He denies.

"Sure, buddy. Then how come you can't even make eye contact with me?" I question, staring him down. He looks into my eyes for the first time in the past few minutes.

"Ella I-" He starts, but stops himself and looks down, anxiety building up inside of him. I place one hand in his and use the other to bring his chin back up.

"It's okay. You don't have to tell me." I reassure him.

"I-I want to." He tries to explain.

"It's okay, Nathan. I mean it. I, more than anyone, know how hard it is to talk about your problems. Just know I'm here, always."

"Thank you. I'm going to, I promise. I just need some time to process."

"That's alright, let's just go skate." I tell him and he nods.

It's fine, I can have patience. I'll wait. forever.

Oh shut up voice stop being so cringey.

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Nathan's pov:

I'm getting changed in the locker room at an extremely slow pace as I try to process what happened today.

After years and years of hurt I should have got used to my father and his antics. But I never did.

He was texting me and calling me all day at school today. He wanted me to come home because apparently I was being selfish for wanting to go to school. He came back from a long haul last night, which I only knew as I saw his truck on the road, and since then he emptied every bottle of alcohol in the cupboard.

I hated everything about him. I always had. But what made me hate him even more was the fact he made me keep secrets from Arabella. The girl that was brave enough to share her whole story with me, happened to be the girl that I was keeping from darkest secret from.

I sigh and I realise that I was missing time that could be spent with Ella on thinking about him. I quickly put my uniform on and leave the locker room.

While I got changed Ella got straight on the ice so when I get there I see that she already has the music on and is practicing her routine. And holy shit is it amazing.

Every turn is sharp and precise, her jumps are higher than I have ever seen before and she twists and flexes her body in ways that I didn't even know where possible.

My dirty mind goes to a dark place at the thoughts of what I could do with that flexibility.

The song that plays has become one of my favourite songs. I tend to play Haunted a lot because it reminds me of her and how strong she is for living with the ghosts of her past and surviving through the ways they have harmed her.

There is no way she loses the competition in a couple of weeks, with the amount of practice she does now she's not at school and her deep connection to the song that will evoke emotion in any audience member, she is destined to win.

When the song end I realise I had been gaping at her and quickly closed my mouth and got onto the rink.

I was lucky that I had another private slot for practice because I could never be fully productive with Arabella as the beautiful distraction that skated opposite me.

I clap as she turns the music off, which makes her blush.

So fucking cute.

"That was incredible, Ella. You really are an amazing skater." I complement, which makes her cheeks even redder.

"Says you! All my aunt and uncle go on about how there is no way you don't go professional." She replies, skating up to me.

"Hey! They also go on about your future at the olympics." I remind her.

"No they don't." She says the fun tone in her voice dropping, rolling her eyes and turning away. She begins going over some of the turns before I interrupt her.

"Ella. I hate the way you don't see."

"What the hell are you talking about?" She asks.

"You don't see that people care about what you do. Your aunt, your uncle, Ryan, your friends and more than anyone me. We are all in fucking awe of how talented you are but you don't see that." I insist, skating up to her and taking her hands in mind.

"I-I don't know what you mean." She replies, looking away from me.

"Yes you do. Your dad may have been completely fucking blind to how incredible you are. But I sure as hell am not. I see you, Ella. And I hate that you don't know that. I see you." I repeat, letting go of her hands and bringing mine to her cheeks.

My heart beats faster than ever and every muscle and bone of my body is being pulled towards her by an unknown magnesium force.

"You see me?" She questions.

I don't answer.

Instead, I do the thing I have been dying to for weeks. Actually scrap that, for the past year.

I kiss her.

And my body is set on fire by her gentle touch as she brings her hands to my chest and kisses me back.