Don't run away from me

ch. 31

//joshua;

Since he was with Seokmin, Joshua no longer realizes the passage of time, constantly lost in the sweet company of the boy. Thus, the new semester begins, and they both have to return to their respective apartments with their roommates. Back to his daily routine, Joshua is at the library, working on one of his assignments on his laptop. Suddenly, he feels a new presence next to him and gets distracted. When he realizes that it's Seokmin's friend, Mingyu, Joshua is stunned for a few seconds.

"Can I talk to you for a moment? Please?" Joshua realizes from his voice that he was desperate and needed his help.

Joshua quickly gathers his things, leaving the library and following Mingyu to a nearby cafe, but not the one where he worked. Sitting at a table, Joshua sees that Mingyu is a little agitated, starting to worry about Seokmin, thinking that something serious has happened.

"Look, hyung. I made a big mistake, and I think I'm starting to lose Seokmin completely, and no matter what I do, I can't convince him to talk to me for a few minutes." Mingyu bursts into tears, taking Joshua by surprise because he had no idea how to react. "Seokmin is a very dear friend, he's been my best friend since high school, and I care a lot about him, but I've messed up a lot and I don't know if he will ever forgive me."

Joshua approaches Mingyu and starts patting him on the back, as it's the only method that comes to mind to console him while he sobs uncontrollably into his hands, with his head down.

"I hid my relationship with Wonwoo hyung from Seokmin for 3 years."

"Oh-" Joshua remains shocked, with his mouth forming a perfect "o," and when Mingyu sees his reaction, he starts crying even harder. "Why would you hide something like that from Seokmin..."

"I don't know, Shua hyung. I don't know. We never expected to feel something for each other, and this whole mess started from a stupid mistake when we were both hormone-filled boys, and along the way, we started developing feelings. Then Seokmin went through a difficult period, and we never found the right opportunity to bring up my relationship with Wonwoo. I don't know how well they would have taken it anyway, and now Wonwoo hyung and Seokmin are fighting terribly, not speaking to each other at all, and it resulted in my breakup with Wonwoo. I tried talking to Seokmin and apologizing, but he hates me now and I feel extremely guilty that because of me, he fought with his brother, so I decided to run away from both of them and I feel like the lowest person on earth. I miss them both and don't know what to do." At this point, Mingyu started to sigh more and more, pausing in the middle of his words, and Joshua had to decipher what he was saying. It was clear how much Mingyu was suffering, judging by the dark circles under his eyes, the unshaven beard, unkempt and grown hair, and the way he cries with so much pain. Overwhelmed by the situation, Joshua embraces Mingyu, trying to calm him down. It eventually works, with Joshua giving him all the time he needs to gather himself and start speaking again.

'Hyung... Please help me fix this. I need you because Seokmin would only listen to you.' Mingyu holds Joshua's hands in his own, looking at him with a glimmer of hope in his eyes.

Joshua feels his stomach tighten into a knot, sensing the immense pressure on his shoulders, but he couldn't refuse Mingyu's gaze.

'I'll help you, but I can't resolve this conflict for you. I can only help arrange a meeting between the two of you. But it's up to you to talk to him and resolve this issue, okay?'

Mingyu energetically nods his head and then jumps up, embracing Joshua tightly.

'Thank you, thank you, thank you! I'll be forever indebted to you!!' Joshua chuckles softly and returns the embrace, gently patting his back.

//seokmin;

Since classes started again, Seokmin and Joshua met less often, probably only once a week, and each time Joshua seemed glued to his phone. Inside Seokmin, small suspicions and doubts start to arise, feeling a mix of jealousy and anxiety. They were both on Seokmin's couch, with Seungwan being away at Hansol's that evening. They were trying to watch a movie, but Joshua's phone kept receiving an unusually high number of notifications, to which Joshua occasionally chuckled and avoided responding to the messages when his boyfriend was near. Seokmin had blind trust in Joshua, but anyone would be bothered by such a situation.

Trying to keep calm and avoid exploding, Seokmin pauses the movie and gets up to go to the kitchen to wet his throat with some water. Joshua didn't even notice that he had gotten up from the couch, being too absorbed in his phone screen.

"With whom are you texting?" Seokmin blurts out without realizing it, his voice making Joshua jump and immediately hide his phone.

"No one." Joshua gets up from his lying position and smiles innocently at Seokmin.

Seokmin starts to feel the glass trembling in his hand as he brings it towards his mouth, his blood starting to boil in his veins.

"It doesn't seem like you're talking to anyone. You don't even know what movie we're watching." Seokmin sets the glass down and crosses his arms over his chest.

"Oh yes! We're watching 'The Avengers'," Joshua bursts into a light laughter as if it was the easiest answer possible.

"Jisoo," Seokmin uses every ounce of his willpower to not burst into a crisis. "We've been watching 'Star Wars' for over an hour."

Joshua's expression changes when he realizes that Seokmin is right, and he swallows nervously, a new notification appearing on his phone.

"So?" Seokmin raises an eyebrow, visibly losing his patience.

Joshua gets up from the couch and stands in front of Seokmin, starting to touch his arms and muscles, and Seokmin realizes that Joshua is actually hiding something because he wasn't able to lie to him.

'Hyung..' Seokmin loses all energy in his body as his gaze meets Joshua's, who now has his arms around his neck. 'Have you found someone else?' Seokmin's question comes out whispered, the fear of receiving an answer choking his voice.

Joshua's eyes widen suddenly, a furious expression appearing on his face.

'How could you think that, Seokmin?!' Joshua takes a step back. 'Do you think I'm some kind of player who goes from flower to flower? Is that how you see me all this time?' Joshua starts to raise his voice and throws his hands in the air, visibly hurt as tears form in his eyes.

'Wait, no..' Seokmin tries to grab Joshua's wrist, but Joshua pulls it away and after picking up his phone from the couch, he heads towards the bedroom and slams the door behind him.

Seokmin feels like he's about to lose it, sighing heavily, and sits back on the couch, running his hands through his hair in distress. He decides to stay there for a few hours because the tension between them was too high, and it was clear that both of them needed time to calm down.

When he enters the bedroom, Joshua is facing away from where Seokmin should be sleeping. He sits on the bed and moves closer until his abdomen is pressed against Joshua's back. He realizes that Joshua isn't asleep based on his breathing.

"I'm sorry, Shua hyung. I didn't mean to hurt you with my words or accuse you of anything. I trust you a lot and I don't want you to have a negative impression of how I think or see you. I won't repeat this mistake, it was my insecurity that came out without much time to reflect on it." Seokmin whispers in Joshua's ear, leaving a kiss on his temple.

After a few moments of silence, Joshua turns to face Seokmin and embraces his waist, looking into his eyes. Both of them had swollen, red eyes from crying.

"I'm sorry for my reaction too. And I'm sorry for not giving you enough attention lately and neglecting you to the point where you fell prey to this insecurity. I could never cheat on you, no one is better than you, and all I want and need is you. My beautiful boy. I'm yours only." Joshua caresses Seokmin's cheek, then leans in and gently kisses his lips, full of tenderness and emotion. The two reveal their passion, deepening the kiss more than they should have, clearly indicating the actions that would follow based on how eager they were for each other.