House Of Memories

- LV -

"My demons..." Elina began, sat in a single sofa, looking down to herself with a soft tinged smile and hands clasped together, carried on. "Though quiet, are never quite silenced, you know?" She pushed to question across to her therapist.

Never in her life had she imagined she'd been in this setting. Would be in this setting, evidently seeking help from a therapist. She'd came across an add online and thought simply, why not? The therapist called Rachel was modest and sweet. An older woman with shiny grey bobbed hair and glasses which balanced smoothly on her nose. She seemed sweet and Elina did her best to ignore the warning bells of thinking something, anything could go wrong.

"You have an interesting outtake, Miss Hooper." Rachel responded with notepad in hand and a pen balanced between forefinger and middle. Apparently she was German. "On what exactly?"

"Life." Rachel gleamed with a soft smile. She turned her head down to look over her notes and speak in a conclusion. "From what you've allowed yourself to share and from the loose access I've been allowed to have on your medical files, you haven't had the easiest of lives, have you?"

Elina laughed politely. "I suppose not, no. It's taken me a great deal to finally admit so."

"Why do you admit to it now?" Rachel progressed. Elina looked round to herself as well as looking to every aspect to the room. "I feel as though I have something sort of good in my life and I don't want anything to come between that." She shook her head over the last few words, adamant to do everything in her power to make sure only positives happened from now. "I want to be better now before this one..." She patted her bump half-heartedly. "Comes along."

"That's understandable but you are allowed to grieve and feel the negativities on life."

"Am I? Rachel, people depend on me... More than some let on. I don't want to be haunted or vulnerable when it comes to relations with my past, preferably childhood. I thought years ago that I had made peace with it all but I've grown older and nothing has seemed to get better without a cost. The people I love are either dead or in some sort of limbo and..." Elina rambled off a little lost on what else to say.

"Ah, but people are only at a loss if they haven't made the verbal agreement amongst themselves that they admit they're in love or have love." Rachel concluded before putting her notepad aside and truly looking to her. She was sure she knew this woman. "So which is it?"

"Admitting it to him would be detrimental at this point. It put a spanner in the works and bugger it up entirely."

"So you don't believe he returns your feelings?" The therapist rephrased. "It's not that I don't believe it because I very much do but he's not a man like the rest in the gene pool which I'm sure he's proud of. He has his own underlying problems which I'm sure have made him the man he is today. He loves his brother and he loves his family and job but they're not me." Elina explained openly before carrying on. "The relationship I have with him now is because of me. I wouldn't be surprised if he's only with me now because of our daughter. I've made so many mistakes and if I am to do this, it's to be on his terms."