Rebel | Jinkook

Thirty-Four

A/N: Here you go since I woke up for some unknown reason at 4 am! 🤦‍♀️ Today will be a long day... my first meeting starts in 20 mins! 

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Flashback

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"Then why are you trying to hurt me like this? My heart, it hurts Jungkook." Jin rested his head against Jungkook's thigh, overcome with emotion, as tears streamed down his face. He pleaded, "Please, I am asking you, don't do this."

As Jungkook sat there and listened to Jin sob, he felt his heart shatter into a million pieces, and he had no idea what to do about it. He was completely helpless in the situation. He had been in love with the wrong person the whole time, but he couldn't help himself. Someone like Jin did not have a place with him. He was given a resounding and clear warning about it.

....

"Why are you not saying anything to me?" Jin pulled back, wiping his eyes as he looked at Jungkook. He despised the uncomfortable silence that lingered between them. He sought reassurance from Jungkook, wanting confirmation that Jungkook was not giving up on him, even though that was his impression.

Jungkook let out a sigh, feeling a heaviness in his heart. It wasn't that he didn't have anything to say; rather, he didn't know what to say. There was nothing he could do.

"Jungkook, please, talk to me. I don't like what I am feeling. You are my only style, the only person I can ever see myself being with, like how my parents are. Can you please understand that?" Jin's eyes pleaded with Jungkook's as he struggled to comprehend the sudden change in their relationship. He couldn't understand why Jungkook wanted to let go of their relationship, causing him sadness. He had no interest in anyone else; he only desired Jungkook and was absolutely certain about it.

Jungkook gently took Jin's hand in his own, tenderly rubbing it. He struggled to find the right words or convey the depth of his emotions. The situation deeply hurt him, as his greatest fear from the beginning had become a reality. Someone like him was not suitable to be with Seokjin. Despite being aware of this, he allowed hope and his friend's words to persuade him to believe the impossible could become possible.

After a few minutes of silence, with only Jin's sniffles filling the air, Jungkook took a deep breath and finally spoke. "Seokjin, I want you to know that everything I have said to you in the past has been sincere, and I am not trying to hurt you right now-"

"But you are hurting me. My heart feels it-"

"Seokjin-" Jungkook attempted to interrupt Jin, but Jin did not allow him to do so. "I want to finish my thoughts, Jungkook. I may not be the smartest, and I may not know how to say everything right, but I think I show you my love and everything I feel. I don't think I need a strong brain to do that, and I do it so you can see it. From the night I saw you and you saw me, I was never afraid to show you that you were my style.

Meeting you was new to me. Before I saw you, I didn't have the feelings that came that night with other people. It only happened to you. I have seen a lot of other guys, and I even went out with one tonight, and I didn't get the feel with them that I got with you. If I did, it would be okay to say goodbye to you, but since I didn't get it with them, I don't want to say goodbye to you."

Jin paused, struggling to find the right words as his emotions made it difficult for him to express himself. He had a sense of losing and was determined not to lose the person he cared about the most.

"I don't know if you can say goodbye to me because you have the feeling you have with me with someone else. If that's what happened, I am asking you to please cancel those feelings for whoever the person is because they are not me. It's a temporary feeling you might not know about yet, and you will end up really sad, especially if you lose me, just like I will be sad if I lose you. So please think about it and don't get hurt or hurt me."