True Love's Bite

17 // Heartbeat

'They grow up so fast.'

That was amongst some of the things I hated hearing, especially when it came from that supposedly distant family relative or friend who hasn't seen you in years, or the actual family member and friend. As if children were not supposed to grow.

I personally believe it was just a ruse to get the parents to disclose every single progress the child has made, and they could if they were proud of you. But I didn't want to imagine what it was like if the opposite was true, like in my case. A true disappointment to my mother.

I often wondered what she told people about me, she probably painted herself as a saint while I was deemed the outward daughter. She had completely written me off, and she hung up on me and blocked my number the moment she heard my voice when I tried calling her.

She shattered me for the last time, honestly.

I was reeling in the aftermath of having a mother like her. It make me often doubt myself, I grew up constantly reminding myself that when I have my own children, I'd never treat them the way my mother treated my sister and I, I promised myself that I would be a better mother than she ever was.

Now that I was staring at my growing belly in the mirror, I wondered what kind of mother I would make.

Time flew by so fast, I knew my stomach would start to show eventually, and now that it did, it was a bittersweet moment. A part of me was happy that there was a life growing inside me, but the broken part of me dreaded the growth as it brought me weeks and weeks closer to giving birth and officially becoming a mom.

There was a light knock at the door. "Can I come in?" Silas asked, slightly opening the door. "Are you okay in there?" He asked, peeking inside.

"Yeah." I flattened out the wrinkles on my maternity dress.

Silas smiled brightly and stepped inside when he noticed the dress he had bought for me last week. "I knew that would look great on you." He walked over to me and stood behind me, his hands resting on my belly as he pulled me against his body and leaned his head on my shoulders. "You look really beautiful." He kissed my cheek, making me blush.

Things have been great between us since the stay at the tree house. The compliments, gifts, being taken care of in every aspect, and the constant reassurance... I could never get used to it, but I could never get tired of it either. It was amazing.

I guess one could say we were together, we hadn't put a label to it over the last few weeks, but we were doing everything most couples do and we were happy.

Today was my first official checkup with the gynae. We had been putting it off because of the morning sickness which was worse on some days. I was now at twelve weeks.

"Are we ready?" He asked while rubbing my belly.

I exhaled nervously and shook my head. "No, not really," I said hastily, panic in my eyes.

"Yvonne." Silas came around me and obstructed my view of the mirror. "We have been putting this off for a while now, but we have to see the doctor today. I won't be able to rest until I know that you and the baby are fine."

"I know, I know." I felt ashamed because I never considered him whenever I kept pushing back the checkup. "I'm sorry."

"It's okay, come on, Esra is waiting for us." He got my bag and phone from the bed and took my hand as he led me out of my room.

"Took you long enough!" Esra chided as soon as she spotted us walking down the stairs hand-in-hand. "Some of us still need to get to work."

I grimaced at her remark, I don't know why, but I felt like Esra's attitude towards me had changed these past few weeks. She was so curt and impolite, and she always made jabs about her working, especially after Silas took a few days off work to spend time with me.