Meetha sa Ruhani ISHQ (Sequel)

258. Mini questions Ashok

I AM REALLY NOT WELL BUT TODAY MINI COMPLETED 5 YRS SO I AM POSTING THIS PART. I AM REALLY GRATEFUL THAT YOU ALL CARE FOR ME. BUT WHENEVER IT'S POSSIBLE I DO INFORM YOU. KINDLY DON'T FEEL NEGLECTED IF I DON'T ANSWER YOUR COMMENTS OR DMs. IT'S HARD TIME FOR ME NOW. PLS UNDERSTAND. THANK YOU.

Ashok felt a hope and approached Mini once again. Neil opened the door for Mini and she was about to get seated when he spoke out while walking to them.

Ashok: Mini....

Mini turned and saw him. Her smile vanished again but she didn't felt the same anxiety again. 

Ashok: Mini... I am Sorry.... (joining his hands) Main tumse haath jod ke maafi maangta hu... Mujhe ek mauka de do na pls.

Mini glanced at his joined hands and then at him. Neil saw her eyes getting wet again but she took a deep breath and then got cold and emotionless in her expressions.

Mini: Kis baat ka mauka maang rahe hai aap?

Ashok: Mujhe tumse contact me rehne ka bhi haq nahi hai kya?... Main agar tumse baat karna chahta hu to usme galat kya hai Mini?

Mini: Aap khud yaad kyu nahi karte ki aapne kya kya galat kiya hai?... Aur kis haq ki baat kar rahe hai aap?... Mujhpar haq main logo ko khud deti hu aur aapko maine kabhi koi haq nahi diya. 

Ashok felt taken aback and guilt was already filled in him listening to her outburst. His head was lowered of shame and he stepped back. His eyes was filled with tears. 

Mini moved her hand back and held the door which Neil was holding and pushed it close behind her for Arya to not get disturbed.

Mini: Rukiye.

Ashok looked at her. 

Mini: Mujhe aapki side ki story sunni hai....

Ashok: Par...

Mini: Aapko agar excuse hi dena hai to main yaha free nahi baithi hu... Mujhe fizool ke mauke dene ki aadat nahi hai.... I demand answers not petty excuses.

Her voice was cold and deprived of any emotions. All that can be felt by her voice was hurt.

Ashok took a sigh and cleared his throat.

Ashok: Mini... Ab mujhe lagta hai ki tum samajh sakti ho ek aadmi aur aurat ka rishta itna straightforward nahi hota jitna lagta hai... Mera aur tumhari maa ka rishta hua tab na main itna mature vaise bhi nahi tha... Biji Papaji ne rishte sujhaaye the unme mujhe Babita pasand aayi kyunki vo bahot sada simple aur gharelu type ki ladki thi... Mujhe laga mera saath nibhaayegi... Hamari shaadi ho gayi aur kuch 1-1.5 mahine baad hi London jaane ka mauka mila mujhe... Bahot khush tha main...
Maine socha tha ki ek baar sab set kar lunga to Babita aur main London me hi settle ho jayenge... Yahi bola bhi tha maine Babita ko... Kuch hafto baad khabar mili Babita ki pregnancy ki... Main kaam ki wajah se aa nahi paaya tha... 1 saal se bhi zyada ho gaya tab itne paise jod paaya ki ghar bhejne ke saath saath flight tickets bhi afford kar saku... To ghar aaya... Kuch dino me wapas aana pad raha tha to Babita se pucha tha maine... Lekin usne keh diya ki Biji Papaji ka dhyaan kaun rakhega... Lovely ki bhi nayi nayi shaadi hui thi... Tumhe kaise le chalein... vo dono akele ho jayenge... 
Phir London aa gaya main... 2 saal baad phir India gaya... Kuch dino ke liye... Tab main chahta tha ki Babita aur tumhe London le aaun... Main akela mehsoos karta tha yahan.... Par usko kaise kehta yeh... Usko jab bhi bola maine aane ke liye to tension me aake badbadaane lagti thi aur yeh bolne lagti thi ki bas aap ab yaha vapas aa jayiye.... Kuch dino me phir London aaya.... Dekho... main jaanta hu ki tumhari maa bhi akeli thi vo Biji ya Lovely se keh sakti thi na... Nahi to ro hi leti hogi... Lekin saath to tha na uske paas parivaar ka... Mere paas itni dur kya tha Mini?... Kuch bhi to nahi... Phir bhi kayi saalon tak akelepan se jhoojha maine... Bar me jaana shuru kar diya taaki ghar pe baithe baithe sochu nahi...
I was alone... Main chahta tha ki sirf ek baar Babita bhi mujhe support karne ke liye itna bol de ki vo bhi jaana chahti hai par usne aisa kabhi nahi kaha... Main itna hi to support chahta tha Mini... Kya yeh bhi galat hai?... Kya apne partner se itna expect karna galat tha mera?.... I had no one for me.. Not a single one.... Babita kabhi aage se aake baat bhi nahi karti thi..... Na kabhi koi letter ka jawaab deti thi.... Ghar me sukhi bhai aur lovely bhi aa gaye the permanently..... Sabke finances mujh par aa gaye the.... I was burdened.....
Phir ek din bar me mujhe Meeta mili... broken like me... we both needed someone in their life... Main bas yahi chahta tha ki mujhe bhi koi aisa mile jo mera hone chahta tha... Main dar gaya tha ki kahin vo ek insaan jo mujhe mila hai kahin mujhse door na ho jaye... 3 saal tak chupa ke rakha maine yeh sach ki main shadishuda hu.. ek beti ka baap hu... Par phir ek din usne lovely ka ek mail padh liya aur usko pata chal gya... Lekin phir bhi she gave me a chance to speak out to my family....
Babita se to already door hi rehta tha main... Bahot gussa aata tha mujhe Babita pe... Uski wajah se hua tha yeh sab... Vo nahi chahti thi mujhe support karna... Babita ki wajah se maine vo sab pal kho diya the jisme main tumhare saath ho sakta tha... I was guilty cause I betrayed Babita but more than that I was angry at her to keep you away from me. Maybe all that rage... all that anger resulted in whatever happened when I came India for the last time when you were just 17..... I am sorry beta... mujhe pata hai bahot galat kiya maine...
Maine us letter me yahi likha tha taaki tumhe bata saku ki main wapas aa raha hu kuch time me.... tumse baat karna chahta tha.... actually tumse maafi maangna chahta tha... tumhe samajhna chahta tha main....
Dekho Mini... Ek aur baat clear karna chahta hu main... agar tum samajh sako.... mere aur babita ke beech jo bhi hua uske liye sirf main responsible nahi hu....
Usne kabhi kisi baat me mera saath diya hi nahi.... Kabhi mujhe support nahi kiya usne...