Today was already shitty and it's only 9am. Practice starts at 10:30am and for the life of me I can't remember where I put my keys, phone and cleats.
After finding my phone, it was in my hand, I finally found my keys in the cutlery drawer, now I just need my cleats and I'm good to go.
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Yeahhh, so the cleats were in my bag the whole time...great...love my life.
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I arrived just on time for practice to begin and started stretching with the others, Katie my best friend, came over and we were talking about our morning.
"I don't know how I didn't notice that I was holding my phone the whole time, and how the fuck did my keys end up with the cutlery" I asked her still not understanding how they ended up there.
Katie was hysterically laughing at my expense causing a few heads to turn, intrigued to know what happened. I groaned and laid face down in the grass causing more laughter and questions.
"How you haven't lost your bloody head I will never know" she finally got out still laughing "We should put a GPS tracker on your things"
"What good would a tracker be when she would probably lose it before putting it on or forget she has it" Beth piped in, probably having figured out what the conversation is about.
"Yeah the only reason you haven't lost your head is because it's stuck to your body" Viv commented in her usual monotone voice.
"Oi! Bug of you fuckers at least my life has some kind of meaning" I told them trying to get a little control back. Before they got the chance to respond Kim walked up to us trying to but an end to our bickering, ultimately making things worse.
"Girls leave the kid alone and start practice or you'll get two extra laps of the pitch" she said kind of sternly but also in a jokey way.
One thing about me is that I'm seen as the "kid" on the team, even though I'm not the youngest. I'm 21 as of a week ago but I started when I was 16 and they still see me as such. It does have its perks as I can get away with almost anything but at the same time they tend to be a bit much protective.
Kim and Jen are the most protective ones but Viv and Katie have their moments. They know most of what I went through when I was a kid and have showed me what it's like to be loved. They have seen me at my best and worst but not once did they leave me, I could never repay them for what they have done for me but I sure as hell will try.
We just finished set-pieces, before that we did dribbling, passing and penalties, now it's time for a 5-a site match.
In my team we have Manu, Leah, Me, Gio and Viv.
The other team has Sabrina, Katie, Lia, Vic and Lina.
The game is going well and my team is winning. Leah passes the ball to me and I'm up against Katie, just lovely, she tries to get the ball but I see an opportunity and meg her, oh how stupid that was, I set up to take the shot and right after the ball left my foot I get tackled to the ground.
You see Katie and I are best friends but when we go against each other it often gets ugly, like right now for example.
"WTF MATE? ARE YOU FUCKING CRAZY?!" I shouted at her and got right in her face. I'm fuming right now and we'll probably start fighting, oh well that's life.
"I don't know what you're talking about, I didn't do anything" she says with a grin, knowing it will irritate me.
"WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DIDN'T DO ANYTHING, YOU TOOK MY FUCKING LEGS OUT" still screaming at her and taking it a step further by pushing her a tiny bit, OK maybe I pushed her a bit harder than I thought, fiiiine I shoved her to the ground. Although she did deserve it.
Before she had a chance to stand up Leah and Kim came over, which was probably the smartest decision, before it could get out of hand. Katie and I are both very passionate players and although we're friends, we do have the tendency to punch each other once every blue moon.
*cough* once a week *cough*
Leah dragged me away by my ear clearly not impressed "What the hell were you thinking kid?" she scolded me "Let me rephrase that, were you thinking? The two of you clearly weren't because this happens at least once a week and we're beginning to run low on First aid supplies" as she continued ranting, I began laughing causing her to look up at me, YES i'm tall fuck off.
When I finally stopped, I said "You know, if thinking it through was a thing Katie and I could do we'd not be in this profession" I continued laughing while she just stared at me " OK, ok I'm really sorry and it won't happen again" I gave her my best smile hoping it would convince her.
It didn't "sure it won't" was all she said before walking away, causing me to laugh even harder.
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Practice was finally over and we were on our way home. Katie and I made up after about 10 minutes and went back to being our lovely self's (aka taking the piss out of anyone close by). We decided to go back to my place to watch movies, or at least that's what we told Kim and Leah.
When we arrived we went to the fridge and got ourselves a beer before crashing on the sofa.
"Have you ever just had the urge to disappear and never return? Like being on an island where everything is just peaceful, no stress, no worries, no problems just nothing" I asked her after a little while.
"You know, sometimes I really worry about you when you say shit like that" letting out a laugh she continued "But yeah, I've thought about it but I'd never do it. Why do you ask"
"I don't know sometimes it just gets too much and I feel like I don't have anyone" I sigh "Don't get me wrong I know I have you guys but sometimes I just feel like a bother and my brain tells me I just need to keep it to myself" I tell her truthfully.
I often think about what would've happened if it had worked, would I be happier, would I have regrets or would I just feel nothing. The reality is, I will never know because it didn't work, I lived, but why? Aren't people normally happy when they fail? If so, why am I not one of those people.
Before I can spiral any further Katie speaks up "Well your brain is wrong. You are and will never be a bother to any of us. We all love you so much and we would do anything to help you, you just need to tell us" she tells me seriously and with nothing but kindness in her eyes.
Deciding to actually watch a movie, we get comfy on the couch and put on Tarzan. After the movie is finished Katie decides to stay over because of the beer she drank, but I know she's worried about me and I feel bad that she has to deal with this.
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AN
I've had the same song stuck on my brain for like 2 months straight and I'm loosing my fucking mind
Anyway hope your day was good
Still don't know where this is going
YOU ARE READING
Future me problems
FanfictionSara Grey is a young footballer for arsenal, she hasn't had the easiest life but is trying to make the most of it. Sara has a temper often earning yellow cards because of it. She uses sarcasm and humor to cope with trauma which sometimes gets her in...
