Out Of The Woods - A Taylor Swift Adoption Story

Chapter 12: Grounding

The following morning, Taylor called the adoption agency for an update, her heart filled with a mix of hope and apprehension. The response, however, was disheartening.

"I'm sorry, Miss Swift, there have been no inquiries for Madison," the caseworker informed her.

Taylor struggled to maintain her composure. "What? How is that possible?" she asked, her voice tinged with frustration.

The caseworker sighed heavily. "Unfortunately, that's how the system works. The older they are..."

"The less chance they have," Taylor interjected, a bitter realization dawning on her.

The caseworker, shuffling papers, offered a lackluster suggestion. "Well, we can always wait."

Taylor closed her eyes, feeling her anger simmering. "Right, wait. Very helpful. Thank you," she said tersely before ending the call.

As she looked up, her gaze met Madison's tearful eyes. The pain in Madison's voice was palpable as she said, "No one wants me, do they? No one wants the big kids."

Taylor's heart broke at the sight. She rushed to Madison, enveloping her in a hug, a mix of sorrow and determination in her eyes. "You are wanted, baby. You are loved," she whispered, her voice cracking with emotion.

Madison shook her head, her tears unabated. "But it doesn't feel like it," she sobbed.

Taylor held her tighter, her own eyes brimming with tears. "I know it's hard to believe right now, but you are so, so important. And I am here for you, no matter what."

Madison clung to Taylor, her small body racked with sobs. In that moment, their bond deepened, rooted in shared pain and unspoken promises. Taylor knew she had to be the rock for Madison, to be the unwavering source of love and support she so desperately needed.

As Taylor held Madison, thoughts of adopting her began to resurface in her mind. However, the reality of her upcoming tour loomed large, casting doubt on the feasibility of such a commitment. Alone in her thoughts, Taylor wrestled with her dilemma.

"Sure, Beyonce has children, but she also has a family," Taylor thought to herself. The comparison highlighted her own solitude in facing such a significant decision. She was torn, feeling the pull of her career on one side and the growing attachment to Madison on the other.

The uncertainty was overwhelming. Taylor struggled internally, unsure of the right path forward. Could she balance her demanding career with the responsibilities of motherhood, especially as a single parent? The question hung in the air, unanswered, as Taylor grappled with her thoughts, the weight of her decision pressing heavily upon her.

Later that day, Taylor and Madison were greeted by Dr. Eleanor Hayes, a therapist. Dr. Hayes arrives to their apartment to protect Madison from the public eye. After short introductions, Taylor opened up about Madison's history and her deep attachment.

"Madison has been through a lot," Taylor shared, her voice tinged with concern. "And she's become very attached to me. I'm worried about her."

Dr. Hayes nodded understandingly. "It sounds like Madison may be experiencing separation anxiety," she suggested gently.

Turning her attention to Madison, Dr. Hayes asked, "Madison, can you tell me how often you think about Taylor being hurt?"

Madison's response was small but laden with emotion. "Every second," she whispered.

Dr. Hayes offered a compassionate smile. "That must be very hard for you. It's okay to feel scared, but we'll work together on ways to help you feel safer, even when Taylor isn't right beside you."

As the therapy session progressed, Dr. Hayes gently guided Madison through her feelings. "When you think about Taylor being hurt, what do you feel inside?" she asked.

Madison, hugging her knees to her chest, replied, "Scared. And alone."

Dr. Hayes turned to Taylor. "It's important for Madison to develop coping strategies for when these thoughts occur. We want her to feel secure, even in your absence."

Taylor nodded, absorbing the advice. "I want to help her with that. Whatever it takes."

Dr. Hayes smiled reassuringly. "It's a process, but we're going to work on it together."

In the final part of the session, Dr. Hayes introduced a practical tool for Madison. "Madison, whenever you start to worry about Taylor, I want you to use a technique called 'grounding.' It helps bring you back to the present moment," she explained.

"Look around you, find five things you can see, four you can touch, three you can hear, two you can smell, and one you can taste. It helps your mind focus on the here and now, instead of your fears," Dr. Hayes continued.

Taylor nodded, understanding the importance of the exercise. "We'll practice that together, Madison," she said, her tone encouraging.

Madison, though still apprehensive, showed a glimmer of curiosity. "I can try that," she said quietly.

Dr. Hayes smiled. "It's a first step, and we'll explore more as we go along. It's been very nice to meet you both."

As Taylor walked Dr. Hayes to the door, she took the opportunity to ask about Madison's situation. "Dr. Hayes, in your opinion, how difficult is Madison's current living situation?"

Dr. Hayes offered a measured response. "Well, it's not ideal. She should be in a permanent, stable environment as soon as possible. But the care and support you're providing her now will greatly benefit her future."

Taylor nodded, understanding the urgency and the impact of her role in Madison's life. "Thank you, Dr. Hayes. I'll do everything I can for her."

Upon returning, Taylor found Madison sitting on the sofa, her eyes scanning the room. "Five things I can see..." Madison murmured, a hint of concentration in her voice. "Taylor, Meredith, the TV, this sofa, a photo of a lake."

Taylor's smile was encouraging. "Keep going, baby."

"Four things I can hear... city traffic, the TV show, your footsteps, and...," Madison paused to listen more intently, "my voice, and a cat meowing."

Taylor sat down beside her. Madison looked up, a small sense of accomplishment in her eyes. "I'm just practicing," she said.

Taylor's heart swelled with pride and hope; Madison was trying, and that was a start. Not giving into her fears will be a huge step in overcoming them. Taylor made sure to remember Dr. Hayes advice - she'll need to practice the grounding technique, too.