Thats Life

Chapter Nine

"My friends always loved coming to our house to sleep over. Until dad got the way he is. The one-time Will brought home a friend, and dad thought it was me... That almost turned out very bad."

"How was today?" Tyson asked before I was able to close the front door behind me.

"Horrible. My head hurts, I threw up, some girl at school was weird to me, and William here was 20 minutes late picking me up." I flipped him off for the 7th time since he was late. I sat there that full 10 minutes after Katie left trying to figure out how I was going to fight him without being called my dad by everyone.

"Hey now, I had to take a shit!" William threw his hands up defensively. "I told him that." He shakes his head then wonders down the hall to his room. Will is a child, and he still believes in 'school clothes' and 'play clothes' so usually after school he goes in and changes to his more casual attire.

After watching for him to close the door to his room, I turn to Tyson, "I can't stop thinking about how easy it would be to make myself feel better..." Will is trying his best to be supportive, I know that, but I think it would be best if he assumed this was easy for me. The whole drug thing makes him uncomfortable, and I can already tell he's going to get a bit upset anytime I bring it up. I'd love to make him feel like he's helping me, but without actually leaning on him for help.

"I know, I'm sorry man. If it helps, you look like shit." he shrugged. I didn't doubt it though, last night was the worst sleep I have ever gotten, and school was just a big cluster fuck of sickness.

"Thanks, yeah that helps a lot." I flipped him off before turning to the fridge. I'm not hungry, I assume that's a drug thing. A lot of the pills I was taking would make you never feel hungry, that's something I still have for some reason. No appetite at all, so I should probably force myself to eat something before I got sick because I wasn't eating.

"We already knew it wouldn't be easy. I'm not really sure what we can do to help you either though. I keep wishing I had the answer for you, but I don't. Other than that, are you feeling okay? Still planning on going through with it?" He's leaning against the counter watching me as I look blankly into the fridge.

After finding a small piece of leftover pizza I pull it out of the fridge and take a bite. "I think so. It's kind of a weird situation, I'm so sick because of not using drugs my body is used to but because I'm sick, the drugs and alcohol don't even sound good. The high sounds great, but the actual act of consuming either, no thank you." Just the thought of any type of alcohol made my stomach tighten.

"Hmm. I guess that makes sense, make sure you come to me if things get bad. Alright?"

"I will. I think I just have to keep myself busy for a bit. Thanks, Tys." I take two more bites of the pizza, then leave it on the counter. I'd throw it away, but I know how money is around here, and I'm positive Will would have no problem devouring it. "For now, I'm going to go sulk and be sick in my room." He didn't say anything as he watched me leave the kitchen.

I was glad to know the darkness still felt like home, it pulled me in and gave me the space to feel numb. Maybe the dark, cold, depressing atmosphere of my room put my brain into a place of comfort since it was where I always went to get high.

I threw the clothes off my chair and sat down. It's too quiet with no music, and it was bound to drive me crazy. I wasn't a fan of TV, so I didn't have one in my room, I was more of a music person. Without my phone, there was no music, so I looked around the room for something to do, I wish I had a computer or even an iPod or something.

I needed to find something to turn off or drown out my brain, I know the longer I sit here thinking the more insane I am going to get. Finally, I remembered something that could work, it was way out of character for me, and I would never do this any other time, but right now I need an escape. I switched into some basketball shorts and a clean dark green hoodie, grabbed my bag with my homework in it and ran out to the living room.