How To Survive In A Dump: The Diary of Mr. Thaddeus

My Business Is My Business

As the buggy makes its way the servants know to return to their respective chores. And like any other day I tell my chauffeur to stop the buggy for a moment so I may determine if they have gone back to work speedily. If not, I would turn the buggy around and belabor them on the fundamentals of hard work. Although there is not much expectation that they might know better. Enough of all this. The servants are all where they need to be so I may leave and go about my business. It is often interesting to watch as we leave my home as it is becoming smaller and smaller in the distance until the mansion looks like a white leaf in a sea of ocean green. 

Of course, the town to the North of it can also be seen down the hill but does not carry the same splendor as that of my own mansion. A most attractive scene as the sun beams in from the east and so I always find my self pleased to sit upon the western side of the chariot so as to not cast too much sun upon my eyes which would never do. My servants which should be of no surprise my reader, would normally have pulled the red silky material to cover these chariot openings, but they seemed to have forgotten. Idiots! It is a menial task so I shall not force myself to such an assignment but will call to the chauffeur as of now and soon reprimand him.

DO YOU NOT READ WHAT I HAVE TO DEAL WITH?

Upon inspection and the repairing of said situation we are off again. Such a wonderful delight.

The material that surrounds my exterior is formed from the furs of the greatest of all creatures. I have heard many of these creatures are no longer in existence although they did meet a very exuberant end. What other existence would they have if they did not give up their soft, precious fur to caress my skin? You may have never heard of such furs or have seen them for that matter, but they are quite beautiful. They are grey but dyed a reddish color to match the rest of the chariot with gold tassel that line the seats. So delicate and fine. But yes, we are nearing our destination and soon I will tell you about the factory that I am now about to visit. 

Prepare yourself because I am sure you know nothing of such greatness, of wonder, and exquisiteness. Such absolute splendor! I am not speaking of myself although those words would suit my demeanor quite nicely. A matter of fact, the women who serve me day and night within my mansion often tell me so. It is a blessing to have such honest help, despite their folly and it is not in my belief that they would be dishonest about such things. If it were so they would be fired upon conclusion of my word and sent with branding to beyond the wall. Privileged are those who work under my careful eye. Many would desire greatly to work under someone such as myself. And besides, servants are such like the water I drink. There are always in abundance.

I often wonder if they should erect a statue of myself in my honor. Would it not be bravura if I were to have all my servants sing songs of me? Of all the wonderful things I have done for this country. And for this community. Every morning and every night they would sing songs regarding all the great and amazing things I have done and have accomplished. At least then they would actually deserve the munificent pay I have given them although all undeserving. Those lazy nincompoops.

I shall not waste any more ink on unimportant matters. Let's move on to something most spectacular. Speaking of the spectacular, let us speak of this chariot factory I know own. The factory has been created from a most precious steel material. It lies behind a heavily painted cement wall that is guarded by dobermans and men with guns. If it were for me to have sympathy for some, I would have felt troubled for the trespassers of times past. I do not believe anyone has tried to enter the vicinity as of recent, but I still worry at times of theft of our gifted manufacturing. The factory is adjacent to what used to be a growing, populous treeline where we have found our best lumber. It is much easier than paying another to cut and send their own inferior saplings. The forest is quite large if you can imagine but may run out of its resources soon. It may be in my own best interest to acquire another source of lumber and build some other business upon the abyss that was once this forest.