"Okay, I mean, will you write me letters?" I then say and try not to push him any further, but I will definitely miss him. He pauses for a while, and he is definitely trying to stay calm. He then turns around and walks over to me, where he gently places his hand on my cheek. As he caresses my face now, he looks directly into my eyes, and he speaks in a soft and caring voice.
"Love.. there's something I have to tell you."
"What's wrong?" I say worriedly. He hesitates to tell me this, as he knows I'll be disappointed by what he has to say. But he knows it would be wrong to keep this a secret from me. He looks at me with a pained face, and he takes a deep breath.
"I have to leave. I have to go away for the summer... I have very important matters to attend to."
"What's wrong?" I say worriedly. Tom doesn't respond at first, but then he finally finds his voice. He looks away quickly, unable to maintain eye contact as he speaks.
"It's nothing you should worry about... I've been given an urgent task to complete for my family here. And I don't really have a choice but to go... but I promise, I'll be back by September. This won't affect our relationship, I just had to tell you I'd be gone for the summer break."
"Okay, but if you can't visit me, can you write me letters? By owl?" I walk up to him and take his hand. He slowly nods his head as he doesn't want to let go of my hand. He seems to realize now just how important it is for him to keep up this relationship despite the circumstances. He looks back at me now, and he gives me a reassuring smile.
"Yes, I will definitely send you letters while I'm away. And I'll send one every week, so you shouldn't worry at all."
"Okay, then I trust you...I hope you find what you're looking for." I know there's more to it than that, but I can't force him to talk to me. After all, we still have 12 days together, and I try not to think too much.
Then I noticed that there's a diary on the desk with Tom's name on it. "Tom, you write a diary?" I say and pick it up. Tom looks at me, startled, and when I flip through the pages, they're blank. Tom freezes as I grab up his diary, and he gets a very panicked look on his face now. I can clearly see that he is afraid I might find out something that he has not told me about yet, and he isn't ready to tell me what's inside it just yet, at least not until he gets back from being away. Tom immediately tries to gently take the diary away from me, but I'm holding on quite tightly to it. "Why isn't there anything in there?" I say in astonishment while he looks at me angrily. Tom seems to get frustrated now that I'm not letting go of his diary, and he continues to try to yank the diary out of my grip. He's really adamant that I do not see what's inside, and he continues to say
"It's nothing important. Just let go of it!"
"Tom, why are you closing yourself off from me like this again?" I sigh and gently turn his head towards me so he can look me in the eye."How am I supposed to trust you if you don't tell me anything?" Tom turns his head away and looks at me angrily. Tom still doesn't say anything for a moment, and he can't look me in the eyes now. I've hit the nail on the head, and he has no response to that. He realizes that he's been acting very distant again, and he feels very ashamed by this. He tries to open his mouth to say something, but he can't do it yet. He's just not in a good space right now to talk about any of his personal things just yet.
Then his face contorts, "Then maybe you shouldn't," he says snappishly and in a harsh tone. I nod and leave his dorm. I can't believe what he just said. Why is he pushing me away like that now? Something must've really set him off now since we were getting along so well earlier. I don't know what to even think right now. I'm trying to wrap my head around what just happened and why he's suddenly acting like this. And I'm also worried about him and the tone he used just now. Whatever's going on with him right now, it doesn't seem to be good at all.
Something is wrong, and I can't help but try to find out what's going on so I go to the library and do some research. When I get there, I look for various books, but nowhere do I find anything about empty magical diaries. I've never seen anything like it. No matter how much I look through the books in the library, I can't find anything that helps me come up with an answer as to how his diary is empty. I begin feeling very confused now, but I also start to feel very worried that there might be more going on with him than I first realized. That diary is a mystery for now, and I feel like there's some hidden truth to it that he doesn't want me to find out. Kim sits down with me and starts talking about my birthday.
Right... my birthday is in 2 days. To be honest, I had totally forgotten. Kim just sits with me now and talks about my upcoming birthday, although I can't help but feel overwhelmed with everything that just happened. Things were perfectly fine just earlier this morning just as I got up, but then everything suddenly changed when I asked him about his diary. I can't really make a connection between the two of these things, but I can tell something is clearly wrong with him. I'm going to just have to wait and see what I can do about this situation, but for now, I'll just have to try and enjoy my birthday that's coming up.
Kim: "Lucia, are you actually listening to me?" says Kim to me as she stares at me. "Yeah...eh, what did you say again?" I say and smile, as she has totally caught me out. Kim chuckles softly as she realizes I'm not really paying attention right now. It's easy to understand why now, considering what just happened with Tom and everything I'm now worrying about. But Kim definitely doesn't want me to go on thinking about things like this, so she tries to change my subject of conversation, and she says
"Well, so, what do you want to do for your birthday then?" Do you have any plans?"
"No, I don't have any plans, to be honest. Let's leave it. I don't feel like celebrating. Tom doesn't even know it's my birthday."
I sigh and continue reading the old book in front of me.
"Oh really? But that's pretty strange...it's your birthday and he doesn't know? He doesn't know your birthday?" She seems surprised by this fact now, as she wasn't expecting this to be true. And now something doesn't seem quite right with this whole scenario.
"We haven't talked about it, honestly. Forget it, Kim. I want to be alone. Is that okay?" Kim is a happy person with lots of energy, and I love her, but ... sometimes it's all too much for me somehow. Kim immediately gets the hint, and she understands that now's not a good time to talk about any of this stuff with me. She notices that I'm not really feeling very social and she can see it on my face. She doesn't look surprised either, and she definitely isn't pushing me to tell her more.
"Alright, I get. Well, I guess I'll just go now.. see you later."
YOU ARE READING
Tom Riddle - Downfall
Fanfic"The monsters were never under my bed. Because the monsters were inside my head. Because all this time the monster has been me." This is the Story of Tom Riddle and his life in Hogwarts when he was 17 and Lucia Grey, a popular girl from Slytherin bu...
