Emma's Mate (ON HOLD)

Chapter 11

Emma Smith

Ashton started to explore every corner of my apartment after my father departed with Detective Alexander Rodriguez. I am clueless about the whereabouts of my father and Detective Rodriguez; I am completely unaware of the location they went to.

I wonder what my father and Ashton told the detective that he was so convinced that Ashton is my boyfriend. I couldn't help but feel a mix of curiosity and anxiety about the situation. Ashton didn't say anything to me, and his silence only added to my confusion.

After he finished looking around, he stood still, staring at nothing in particular. I could tell that his mind was racing, his face conveying a range of emotions. I couldn't help but steal glances at him, trying to decipher what he was thinking.

What should I say to him? Will apologizing be enough to compensate for the pain I caused him? The memory of his screams, the look of hurt on his face, and the way he writhed on the floor when I rejected him still haunted me. It was a moment I deeply regretted, and I couldn't shake the image of his unconscious body on my floor from my mind.

The weight of the situation felt unbearable. I didn't believe I could face Ashton, knowing that he might never forgive me. The thought of his venomous words, filled with anger and disappointment, made me doubt my ability to handle the aftermath of my actions.

I had no idea what I was anticipating. Despite witnessing the optimism in his eyes at the library, I longed for it to alleviate all my troubles. However, my lack of confidence kept me from truly embracing that hope. The anxieties within me insisted that Ashton would despise me.

Unbeknownst to me, tears began streaming down my face. It was only when I heard Ashton move and stand behind me that I realized he was there. I froze, my heart pounding in my chest. This was it, the moment I had been dreading.

In a gentle tone void of any ill intention, he cordially greeted me by softly uttering, "Hi, Emy." I found it unexpected.

I turned slowly to face him, my eyes red and puffy from crying. Ashton's face was filled with a mixture of emotions as he stared at me. He looked fragile, vulnerable in a way I had never seen before. It was a stark contrast to the composed and guarded Ashton I was used to.

We stood there in silence, communicating through our eyes. It felt like an eternity, the weight of our unspoken words hanging heavily in the air. Finally, I mustered the courage to break the silence.

"Ash," I said, my voice trembling. "I know I have caused you a lot of pain." My voice cracked, betraying the depth of my emotions. "I apologize. I sincerely apologize. I didn't mean to hurt you. I was just scared. I am deeply sorry."

"Emy..." Ashton began, but I interrupted him, needing to get everything off my chest.

"No, let me finish," I said, my voice filled with a mix of desperation and determination. "I know what I did was wrong, but it was never my intention to hurt you. You have to understand that. You would have done the same if our roles were reversed," I stated, hoping he would see the truth in my words.

"No, Emy, I..." Ashton tried to interject, but I cut him off again, my insecurities getting the best of me.

"It's best if you accept my rejection, Ash. Then you won't be tied to me anymore. You will be able to enjoy your time with other girls, just like you do now," I said, my voice breaking with each word. It pained me to say those words, to admit that I might lose him forever. But I couldn't bear the thought of holding him back from finding happiness with someone else, even if it means he only engages in meaningless sexual activity with them.

Something inside me shattered as I spoke, the realization of what I might lose hitting me like a tidal wave. I never wanted to lose my mate, even if he was never truly mine. He would never want me as a mate, and I had to come to terms with that. But seeing my dreams come crashing down once again broke me.

Ashton's face flushed with pain, then transformed into a look of pure rage. He growled and grabbed my arms tightly, his hazel-brown eyes turning completely black.

The raw power of authority and possession emanated from him, overwhelming me. I realized that it was not Ashton, but his wolf reacting to the threat of losing his mate. Ashton himself did not want what his wolf desired. This was something he would never want. But then, he blinked his eyes, and after a few blinks, his eyes returned to their original hazel-brown color. However, he didn't release his grip on me. He continued to stare at me with a murderous expression, leaving me utterly baffled.

"You will let me speak. If you interrupt me again, Emma, I will kill you. When we discovered we were mates, you didn't let me say anything. You simply arrived at a conclusion on your own. You are doing the same thing now. Just shut up and let me speak," he snarled, his words laced with a mix of anger and desperation. It was clear that he was struggling to control his emotions.

I was taken aback by his outburst, but I couldn't deny the intensity behind his words. I pushed him away, my own anger rising to the surface. "Did I reach a conclusion? Really, Ashton, are you serious?" I retorted, my voice filled with frustration. "Wasn't it you who never wanted a mate? Wasn't it you who I tried to convince that love isn't a bad thing? Wasn't it you who was determined to reject your mate when they arrived?" I paused, catching my breath. "I was just trying to protect myself from getting hurt."

He sighed heavily, rubbing his hands across his face in frustration. It was clear that we had never argued like this before, and the seriousness of the situation weighed heavily on both of us. The realization that we were using our full names, Emma and Ashton, in such a serious context terrified me. I couldn't bear the thought of losing my best friend, especially not like this.

"Look, I am sorry," Ashton finally said, his voice filled with a mix of regret and sincerity.

"I am sorry too, Ash," I replied, my anger dissipating as I realized the pain we were both feeling.

We smiled softly at each other, a glimmer of hope shining through the tension that had consumed us. But there was still so much left unsaid, so many wounds that needed to be healed.

"You go ahead," I told Ashton, giving him the opportunity to express himself.

"No, Emy, you keep going," he insisted, his voice gentle yet firm.

"No..."

He interjected, saying, "Fine, I will do it," while rolling his eyes. I just gave a silent nod.

Ashton took a deep breath, collecting his thoughts before turning to face me.

His expression was vulnerable, his voice barely above a whisper. "Will you believe me if I say I wasn't going to reject you?" he asked, his eyes searching mine for a glimmer of trust.

I shook my head, tears welling up in my eyes. "No," I replied, my voice filled with a mix of pain and uncertainty. "I can't believe that, Ash. Not after everything that's happened."

Ashton's face fell, his shoulders slumping in defeat. He nodded, his expression crestfallen, and his eyes welling up with unshed tears.

............................................................................

Author's note: If you enjoyed this chapter, please vote and leave a comment. Thank you for taking the time to read this.