Not Izuku, Not Anymore

Monster

Ochaco was quiet as she sat next to Deku, his hand was in her hair, he sighed, he seemed anxious, eyes darting to her door every two seconds, his grip was tight on her.

    "What's wrong?" she asked softly, "You seem so worried, Katsuki isn't just going to come kill you on the spot."    

    Deku sighed "I'm not worried about that. The client I saw tonight, she said something that-that-" he shook his head "It's nothing."

    "No! You need to tell me-"    

    "I don't need to tell you anything." Deku pulled away from her, his eyes grew colder as he looked at her and shook his head once.

    Ochaco frowned, the way he was looking at her, she felt like he was thinking about what it would be like to wear her. She hugged herself.

    "S-sorry."

    Deku wanted to cry, her body language screamed 'please don't hurt me.'

    "You know, sometimes I think we're falling in love, and then you give me that look."

    "I don't know what you mean."

    "You look at me like I'm a fucking monster!" Deku yelled, a self deprecating laugh coming from his lips as he watched Ochaco shrink away from him. "Of course. Of fucking course."

    "What?"

    "You think I'm a monster." 

    Ochaco hesitated

    "No! You are going to speak right fucking now!"

    "Of course I do! You beat Katsuki within an inch of his life! You kidnapped me! But-"
    Deku's heart broke, he wanted to defend himself, tell her Kacchan deserved it, that she just couldn't see it yet, but he stopped himself, she didn't deserve any sort of explanation. Deciding instead, to slip into his persona. He had been an idiot to let her in, she was just like everyone else. If she thought he was a monster, he could show her a monster.

    "Well you didn't think I was a monster this morning, on this couch, or this afternoon in my bed." he smirked at her, "You weren't thinking about Katsuki when you were cumming around this monster's tongue. You didn't even ask this monster to wear a condom."

    Ochaco looked at her knees

    "You asked me. You literally asked me to fuck you." he laughed, "if I'm a monster, what does that make you? I beat Kacchan with a bat, I bound and cut him, and I wish I had done worse." He grabbed her chin, forcing her to look him in the eyes "that's why I took you, you know, cheeks." he said in a mocking tone, "He really loves you. I didn't think it was possible for him to love anything, but he loves you. When he found out what you did with me. Oh, I don't think I've ever hurt anyone that much." He laughed, he watched her begin to cry. There was a break in the facade, his hands twitched, he wanted to hold her so bad it hurt. She's crying for Kacchan, you idiot. She doesn't want you. He stood awkwardly, looking at her with a frown

    "Why are you still here than? You fucked Katsuki's high school girlfriend. Must be so proud. You can leave now."

    Deku thought about folding, apologizing for everything, wrapping his arms around her and consoling her, but he was never good at admitting defeat. He was going to win this fight. He shook his head with a smirk

    "I'm not finished with you."

    Ochaco looked up at him, anger flaring, she punched him in the face, Deku's nose was on fire, he started to laugh, he supposed he deserved that, he grabbed her shoulders, face twisting with hatred, as he thought about breaking her hands. But he felt her struggling, he saw the fear in her eyes, heard her cry. His heart was breaking again, he looked at her hands for a long moment, he thought about kissing them, but he just let her go, climbing off of her and just sitting on the couch with his head in his hands.