I Hate California

twenty seven

Checking my phone while we were all on the plane was the worst idea ever. When I turned my notifications back on, text messages from Travis flooded my phone. Some were good, asking how I was and constant apologizes, and then there were some where he was mad at Joe. I don't think those two have actually ever talked to each other in person and I rather they never do.

We decided that we were going to head back to California instead of New York and I would spend a couple days with them. I was flooded with many emotions when I entered Joe's house, Sage's pictures plastered on each and every wall. From when she was a newborn until now, I smiled at the photoshoots that Joe had gotten with Sage and him, the smiles on their faces were unreal, I wish I was included in them.

"Mommy! Come see my room!" Sage yelled, pulling my arm as I was looking at the pictures a little too long. Joe chuckled as he watched us run up the staircase.

Sage stopped dramatically in front of her door, taking a quick look back at me and slowly opened it. Her room was every kid's dream, very different from her room back in the city, but they both showcased her personality.

I haven't had time to get her room redesigned in my California home yet, it was going to be my next project after the tour, but I was taking in many ideas from this room. I was very proud to see that Sage grew up in such a loving home, she had a big room, a playroom, and could live life as a normal kid since I wasn't there.

"Look at your hat!" She pointed to her top shelf where she had the hat I gave her during the Red era displayed. My heart swooned remembering that moment, the very moment where I was face to face with my daughter and instantly recognized her. It really was fate.

I let her show me all of her little knickknacks and was completely focus as she explained each and every one of them.

Just then there was a knock on the door, "What are you two doing?" Joe asks walking in, holding my phone.

Sage giggles, "I'm showing Mommy all of my things!".

Joe hands me my phone, "He keeps blowing up your phone and even tried to call you", he whispered in my ear.

I sighed, not in the mood to even think about him right now. It felt wrong, but at the same time it felt right. Our relationship wasn't fake, but it ended on bad terms. He lost my trust and it involved my daughter, there was no way I was ever going to give him a second chance after that. At this point, he needed a hard block.

We left Sage to play in her room while Joe helped me get situated in his bedroom. "You still have my old clothes" I whispered to him as I saw them still in the drawers.

He nodded his head, "It's yours, not mine, I wasn't just going to throw away your belongings".

I don't think it was possible for me to love this man even more. I began to unpack my suitcases, storing some clothes in the drawers as I was for sure going to be coming back. I made a mental note to transfer some clothes from my home in Beverly Hills to here.

I felt Joe wrap his arms around my waist and we just stayed there, swaying back and forth.

"Ew! No!" Sage yelled walking into the room and getting in between us.

I giggled and picked her up, "What's wrong with Daddy showing Mommy a little love?" I questioned, smothering her in kisses.

Sage shook her head violently, "You need to show me love first!".

Joe chuckled and ruffled her hair, making her glare at him and she fixed it, oh so elegantly. I held her tightly as Joe hung my shirts in the closet and Sage and I just watched him.