Chalant Candlelight

Chapter 59

(Robin's POV)

"He what?" I said, almost unable to push the words out of my tense jaw,

"He told me what happened, he told me you tried to hurt yourself...well worse than hurt," She kept her eye on me,

"Why did he call you about that?" I started to theorize in my mind that maybe he was warning Zatanna that I was sick in the head and that she should run away from the worthless charity case,

"He wanted me to look after you, to make sure you are okay,"

"Oh," I felt a little bad for thinking Bruce had called her for manipulative reasons, "I'm fine, really, it was just an accident," I shrugged and let her settle back against me as my hands played with her hands,

"It's okay to not be okay, you know that right,"

"Yes, Zatanna, I know that, but right now, I'm just happy to be here with you," I kissed her head, making her melt into me even more,

"Just stay by me, okay?" She stroked my hand with her thumb. Her hands were so much smaller than mine, but they fit perfectly together, "I'll protect you,"

"I know you will," I said and smiled. She turned to me, looking at my face through her eyelashes.

My expression softened on her ethereal beauty. Her lips touched mine slowly. I brought her into a passionate kiss. As the kiss continued, I moved to lay her back on the bed where I could hover over her. She let me gently lay her down, her black soft curls dispersing over her pillow. I hovered for a minute, and we just stared into one another's faces, taking in the beauty before us. I leaned down for another kiss, leaving her hanging as I backed away again. 

This time, I carefully brought my hand to hold the side of her face. Her hand was gently raised to hold my wrist, keeping my hand close to her. I watched her, my thumb caressed her bottom lip, and she naturally parted her mouth a little. I slowly slid my thumb into her lips, letting it sit there as she looked up at me with surprise painted on her doe eyes. She was waiting for more, it was evident in the way she pulled my wrist closer. Her other hand waited for something to do, eager for my next move. Her hand found its way to the gap between my sleeveless shirt and my abs. Her hand caressed it when I removed my finger from her mouth. I took both her hands, pinning them above her head,

"Wait" I breathed, her fingers wrapped around my thumb to comfort herself, she was shaking almost. Not in fear, in nervous excitement, "Is this okay?" I asked my eyes hovering over her. She nodded quickly, taking a deep gulp,

"Yes," She verbally said, her eyes wandering for a second before coming right back to me when I laid another kiss on her lips and then moved to her chin. One hand held her hands trapped the other took her jaw softly moving it so I could kiss her more. My lips wandered down her neck to her collarbone then back up the side of her neck behind her ear. 

She was squirming in my hold so I let her hands go when they both immediately traveled to my back holding me tightly and bringing me down closer so my chest was pressed to hers. My knee was between her legs holding me up from crushing her with all my weight. I attacked her lips once again. 

My hands grabbed her shirt about to pull it up when her hands left my back and stopped mine. I lift myself above her looking with confusion at her face, reading for the part where this was no longer pleasurable for her. She looked more nervous than before,

"What? What happened? Are you okay?" I bring my hands up to cup her face, her hands following and staying on mine,

"I'm sorry," She couldn't meet eyes with me anymore and my heart sank,

"What do you mean, there is nothing to be sorry about?" I quickly move to get off of on top of her so she isn't uncomfortable but she stops me by holding my hands tighter and in place,

"No, Robin, it's not what you think. I want to do this with you," she found my eyes for a second to show her sincerity, "I really do," she assured but her eyes turned away again, "but I've never done this before," she uttered softly and almost ashamed. My eyes got wide again as I quickly backed off of her sitting back on my knees as she sat up, embarrassed and red-faced,

"What?" I said, my voice shaking, "I'm sorry I had just assumed that you had. I had no idea, I-I-" I messed up, I should leave. I really shouldn't be here. I'm disgusting, I'm dirty, I'm unclean. She deserves someone better,

"I'm sorry. I'm so embarrassed right now," she pouted bringing up her hands to cover her face,

"No, no, why are you embarrassed?" I scoot myself closer and reach out taking her face in my hands, stroking her blushing cheeks and wiping the stay tear that had fallen in her nervousness, "It's not embarrassing," I smile at her. I'm more embarrassed. I'm the one with a leaked sex tape, isn't that more embarrassing? I really shouldn't be with her,

"We can keep going," She stoked my hand leaning into my touch and turning to kiss my palm. I paused slowly retracting my touch. She noticed my new apprehension,

"I think we should take it slow," I uttered, watching her expression, nervous for her reaction,

"What's wrong?" She looked at me in confusion, "I really want to do this,"

"I just think it's too early," I found myself being the one unable to make eye contact,

"That wasn't the case a few minutes ago?" She tilted her head to the side,

"Yeah but..."

"Why is it different now? Why are you treating me like I'm suddenly made of glass?"

"I'm not, I...I just don't want you to make a mistake," I put my hands back in my lap where my eyes were stuck,

"What do you mean?" She looked at me with innocent eyes as I felt even worse for ever touching her in the first place,

"It's your first time, Z, I don't want to ruin it,"

"You're not going to ruin it," she reached out for my face as I reluctantly let her caress my face, "I'm not making a mistake picking you to do this with,"

"Zatanna," I put my hand over hers, finally looking back up into her eyes, "I'm ruined,"

"Do you not see a future for us" She pulls her hand from me moving backwards towards her headboard a little, "I just thought with the hairclip and the girlfriend thing that you were serious about this,"

"I am serious about this, Zatanna," I raised my voice a little before bringing it back down, "I want to go slow. I don't want you to regret it if we don't work out"

"If we don't work out?"