A couple of days passed in which Ellen and Mike steadfastly refused to talk about their former fight and anything having to do with their possible future. All the unpleasant subjects left unsaid created a layer of tension that lurked just below the surface and only seemed to disappear temporarily when they were in bed.
Mike had proved to be a conscientious, intense lover from the start, but now he seemed even more determined that each and every experience be as memorable as possible. She was quickly learning that unlike the verbal dexterity he displayed in his everyday life, he was much better at expressing his FEELINGS through action rather than words.
He spoke all too clearly with his body when he made love to her that he was uncertain of her emotional commitment and eager to display HIS. Even if he'd never SAID he loved her, she would have known from the way he touched her, held her, heard it in his kisses. Every movement he made inside her translated easily to "stay with me."
She needed no translation at all for her sister. Vicky made her thoughts all too clear.
"I never planned on staying here forever El. I have a life back home. So do you.
I know you love Tex. I LIKE Peter, but men are like busses. Even if you miss one, another always comes along eventually."
"It's never been that way for me."
"I know. For your entire life up to now you couldn't see anyone else but John. Tex came along though didn't he?"
"Why do you call him that? You know he hates it."
"Exactly."
"You don't like him, do you?"
"He's too straight, too vanilla for me. I sense more than a little 'control freak there as well. But I'm not the one shagging him am I?"
Ellen considered the words her sister had said.
"You really see him as controling?"
"He got you to quit smoking didn't he? There are all kinds of other little things you seem to have changed to suit him as well. And the way he reacted to the idea of your going home even temporarily...THAT smells like an ultimatum. I guarantee that if you decide to go through with it he'll threaten to end things if you don't change your mind. You know, the whole "give me what I want or I'll take my ball and go home" thing.
"Maybe I need to test that. Maybe I SHOULD tell him I'm leaving for awhile and see what happens, how he handles it."
"Say the word, El, and I'm packed all ready."
II
Vicky's prediction proved to be all too accurate. When pressed Mike made it clear that he had no intention of accepting even an impermanent separation. He'd evidently incorporated their relationship into the many other long-term plans he had for his life already, and any deviation was not welcome.
That iron self-control came closer to slipping than she'd ever seen it. There were moments when Ellen believed Mike would actually begin screaming at her.
As it was, each of the cutting, almost vicious statements he made, each in an eerily calm, entirely level voice were nearly unbearable.
And this time there was no passionate reconciliation. Following their final argument which took place the night before she left, he slept in the lone armchair in the living room (IF he slept), and he did not accompany she and Vicky to the airport the next morning. He'd had to work, of course, but Ellen was certain he could have gotten away if he'd wanted to.
It truly seemed to be over, and Ellen was devastated. The brief moment she'd been with Mike had felt like a lifetime. She could only hope that once the shock of her leaving lessened he would soften, reconsider.The Monkees' "I Don't Think You Know Me" and "The Girl I Knew Somewhere" both with Mike singing lead also come to mind here.
YOU ARE READING
Two Different Roads
RomanceEllen Raymond has been working for Beatle manager Brian Epstein for two years. She's also been in the midst of an affair with her childhood friend John Lennon. It is the summer of 1965. The band is on tour in America, staying in a rented house in L...