Two Different Roads

There Goes My Life

August 19th-Memphis, Tennessee. They'd taken a late flight from Boston after a concert there and now they were ensconced in a hotel in this city of the old south, one of the centers of Beatle condemnation.
Ellen was particularly nervous about this one because the Ku Klux Klan had vowed to protest, disrupt the venue. John was anxious as well but trying not to show it, the only clues being his near chainsmoking, constant fussing with his tie, and an even more desperate form of lovemaking than usual over the last couple of days.
She had attempted to comfort him as best she could without bringing too much attention to the distress he hated to acknowledge. She remained near him continually, her hand in his or gently rubbing his temples or his neck and back to ease tension.
That morning she suddenly understood that she must have neglected her own mental well-being until it had reached a critical level. She awoke with an awful nausea she'd never experienced before. She slipped from John's sleeping arms and raced for the bathroom, the little she'd managed to eat the day before coming up almost before she'd gotten her head over the toilet bowl.
When the second round began, he was there, kneeling behind her, holding her hair back out of the way.
"I'm sorry I woke you Johnny."
"Well next time you start vomming all over the place, shut the door," he teased.
When the cramps and heaves finally subsided, she washed her face, brushed her teeth and allowed him to lead her back to bed.
"Was that shrimp cocktail you had on the plane off?" He asked as he spooned her, kissed her neck sweetly.
"I don't think so."
"Well it's not flue season."
"It's probably just nerves from all that's been happening."
A hand roamed over her belly. "Or maybe you're pregnant."
"What!?" She rolled over to face him, panic in her eyes.
"You can't be," he grinned, "You're on those magic pills, remember?"
"Oh my god!"
"You didn't forget one did ya?"
She hesitated. "Maybe...or two...or three."
"Fuck! What about...you know."
"Double fuck! I just realized...I'm late."
Neither could say another word for several seconds.
"Do ya really think?" He whispered at last.
"I don't know. John what am I going to do if I am?"
"What do you mean? Shouldn't it be what are WE gonna do? I'm assuming it'd be mine...unless you've been keeping another guy in the closet."
"Of course it would be yours."
Tears stung her eyes. "This can't be happening."
"Maybe you're not Ellie. We have no idea for sure, not yet. You've thrown up once, and you're what, a few days late? No need to panic already."
"You're right, I know you are, but I can't seem to stop worrying."
"You are or you aren't. Worrying won't change it either way."
She held him close. "I'm scared Johnny."
"No need to be. No matter what happens, I'm here. I wouldn't let you go through it alone. Look at it this way-maybe we can just get married sooner."