Two Different Roads

Having My Baby

Ellen you look awful. Do you need me to give you the day off?"
"No Eppy, I'm fine," she assured him even as she swallowed down another wave of nausea while attempting to go through his itinerary for the day.
John was a constant presence in the hours before the Memphis concert, keeping her supplied with a constant stock of water and crackers, attempting to gage how she was feeling with frequent wondering looks and just hovering over her in general as if he'd already decided that he was indeed going to be a father.
Ellen was concerned that Brian might notice, but thankfully he was too busy with his usual preparations to notice much of anything. Still, he did insist that she take a short rest after lunch.
She had just closed her eyes when she felt weight on the opposite side of the bed. She sat up to find Paul gazing at her expectantly.
"So are you really preggers?"
"Damn that John!"
"Don't be TOO mad. He didn't say anything until I asked why I heard you spewing this morning."
He took her hand. "So are ya?"
"Don't know. Could be."
"Well, I just wanted you to know that we all love ya and we'll be here for ya."
"That's one of the sweetest things anyone's ever said to me Paulie," she told him, wiping away a stray tear.
"What ELSE could I say? You're John's girl. He loves ya, so we love ya."
He kissed her on the cheek, rose from the bed. "If it doesn't work out with Lennie, you could always marry ME, " he told her with a wink.
"Thanks for the offer but I think he'd kill us both."
"Can't blame a guy for trying. You get some rest now. And don't worry, none of us will say a word to Eppy."
II

It was hot here in her place behind the stage. That and the din of screaming teenage girls was enough to cause a near blinding headache. She began to feel a bit dizzy as well, attributed it to the fact that the only thing she'd managed to eat all day were the saltines John had practically forced on her earlier.
He hadn't wanted her to come to the show at all, had even gotten a bit angry when she insisted on attending anyway. He didn't understand. She needed to go on as if everything was normal, had to for her own sanity.
Still, even now she couldn't escape what she was becoming more certain was the truth-she was indeed pregnant. She felt it instinctively. What were they to do?
All at once every thought left her aching head entirely as a loud bang erupted from the stage. She watched helplessly as the boys she'd come to regard as her family all stared from one to the other as if looking to see which had been shot.

John, she had to get to John. But she couldn't make her feet move. Her head throbbed, the world spun drunkenly, and she crumpled to the floor.
III
She was still a bit dizzy when she next opened her eyes to find a stranger bending over her. She blinked, tried to focus as he checked her pulse, her heart beat, took her temperature-a doctor then.
"She seems fine. My guess would be heat stroke. Give her plenty of fluids, keep her cool, and make sure she rests tonight. No strenuous activity tomorrow."
The short, stocky brown-haired man turned to go. As he left the room someone else barreled through the door, practically sprinted for the bed where she lay. She caught the scent of sweat and cigarettes.
"What happened Ellie? Please tell me you're ok."
"I'm fine John...I think. It was hot. I had a headache, I got dizzy, and then I guess I fainted."
She put a hand to his face, remembering now. "I heard what sounded like a gun shot. Are all of YOU ok?"
"Some crazy fucker tossed a fire cracker on stage. Nobody got hurt."
She uncharacteristically burst into tears without warning. He joined her in the bed, held her tight.
"I'm fine my love. I'm more worried about you."
"I'm sure the doctor is right. It was just heat stroke."
"I don't think I believe that. And no matter what you say, I don't think YOU do either."
Brian entered the room then carrying a pitcher of ice water and a large plastic tumbler. He filled it, handed it to Ellen, urged her to drink. John rose to his feet once more, confronted his manager angrily.
"Why didn't you fucking tell me about this Eppy?"
"How was I supposed to do that? I couldn't very well stop the concert and inform you in front of approximately half the city of Memphis that your girlfriend had taken ill. I made sure she was well cared for."
"I for one THANK you Eppy."
He turned to look at her sternly. "You my dear should have informed me that you were feeling that unwell. I absolutely insist you have the day off tomorrow."
"Bloody right you do."
"John I still don't understand why you seem so angry at me."
"You DON'T understand. You have no fucking clue what's really going on here."
"John..." She warned.
"He's going to find out eventually anyway if it's true."
"Find out what?"
"Johnny dont!"
"Ellen's pregnant. Or at least we think she is."
Brian's face turned as pale as snow immediately. "How did this happen? I assumed/hoped that you were taking some kind of...precautions."
"We were, but...well, life is what happens while you're busy making other plans innit."
He stared from one to the other briefly, shook his head, said simply, "I have to go. I have to process this.
IV He lay on his back on the bed next to her, still dressed in the white pinstriped pants and deep red silk shirt he'd worn on stage, the latter unbuttoned, open now, Ellen curled against his bare, damp chest.
"I'm gonna take care of you...both of you," he vowed, caressing her stomach.

"You really do think now that I'm pregnant."
"Don't you?"
"Probably. Oh johnny, this is awful."
"What's so awful about it? I'm actually a bit chuffed to think you've got a little Lennon in there. Timing's off, of course, but I was gonna marry you anyway. We'll work it somehow. And Bri will help. He'll figure it out, you'll see."