𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐈𝐝𝐨𝐥 𝐒𝐡𝐞 𝐋𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐝 ─𝐉𝐉𝐊 (𝐊𝐓𝐇)

T H I R T Y O N E

Y/N'S POV

"Well I've some doubts." He asked after a minute of silence as I hummed in response.

"Have you talked to your family after that? They obviously know about you being here but haven't they tried to reach you? And what about your fiance? What was their reaction did you know anything? And ab-"

"Jungkook calm down. I'm not going anywhere." I stopped him as he was asking all at once.

"uh.. yeah.. i-i was just curious you know" he awkwardly laughed as I shook my head smiling a bit.

"umm.. about my parents they very well know about their daughter. And I can say that they knew they can't force me to do something I don't want to. Maybe they had a little idea about my running away but still they tried giving it a chance. Also they know I'm here safe and when I'll be fine I'll meet them myself. I'm just waiting for the proper time but it's been a year." I chuckled sadly.

"but running away wasn't a good idea y/n. they must be sad."

"I know Jungkook but I can't help either. I really want to go back to my parents and hug them tightly. I'll definitely. maybe the time has come to meet them." I sighed.

I really miss them. the actual reasons for not going back to them was my behaviour. At first I couldn't go back to them after some months of coming here for the first time. Then the sudden change of my behaviour.

If I went back then, then surely my parents would've asked about my behaviour, why I'm not smiling and all that. Maybe they know from Social media about my not smiling but I can make up an excuse now which I couldn't have done back then. Oh Thank God and Jeon.

"you should meet them y/n~ah. they surely miss you a lot." he said in a low voice and I just hummed in response.

There was silence for sometime. Neither I wanted to talk nor him. I could hear his breaths as it was so soothing. He didn't say anything maybe because he wanted me to take my time?

I cleared my throat before continuing. "what were you asking then?"

"hmm what about your fiance?" he asked.

"Excuse me? he was not my fiance okay?" I sat up on my bed and shook my head in disbelief as my brows furrowed. He laughed hearing my voice.

"but you were about to marry him ain't you?" he teased.

"I WAS NOT. GET THAT IN YOUR MIND JEON"

"No" he simply answered as if my warning didn't affect him wow.

"and he was your fiance hahaha" now he's making fun of me.

"JUNGKOOK" I warned him only to hear his laugh more.

i didn't say anything. My heart melted listening to his laugh. My lips formed in a small smile. He seemed to sense the silence as he cleared his throat before saying.

"umm.. y/n?"

"yeah"

"what are you thinking?" he asked after a minute.

"nothing"

"you sure?" I hummed in reply.

"what's the time?" I asked as I looked at the watch.

"oh 3:15am. it's more than an hour" I said as I concentrated on my call again.

"uh.. is it? time flies." he replied.

"I know I know."

"we're going back home tomorrow" he said as I heard the noise from the other side with a long sigh. Maybe he just laid on the bed.

"oh.. why? aren't you enjoying there?" I asked.

"I'm but it's just.. um.. how am I supposed to say? like.. nothing I just wanna go home. Besides Sara isn't helping me at all"

"oh I see"

"hmm"

"don't you have office tomorrow?" he asked.

"I do"

"then ain't you sleeping today?"

"I'll when you'll cut this call"

"oh I'm sorry.. I thought you weren't sleeping at that time. hehe"

"it's okay.. now I've to sleep."

"yeah. Good night."

"good night"

I cut the call and laid on my bed with a long sigh and looked at the ceiling with a small smile. My phone vibrated and i checked it. It was a mail from my office. I checked everything and was about to turn it off but I saw 200+ notifications from Sara. I opened the chat only to see the pictures of them of today. I smiled as I looked at those pictures with awe.

Indeed Sara took a lot of pictures. Her single pictures, The Trio, Bangtan and group pictures. Everyone was looking so happy and my smile grew bigger.

She even created a group. I opened the chat, there were more pictures. My brows furrowed as I looked at the pictures properly. also there were pictures of mine taken secretly. There were my pictures also, talking on the phone, working on my laptop, checking a file, sitting on the balcony, talking with Sara.

There were also pictures of mine playing with Bangtan, videos of walking with them, talking to Jungkook. But one specific picture caught my eyes in which Members were smiling and laughing and i was behind them smiling a little looking at them. The smile wasn't that wide but it was genuine. It was taken on the same playing day.

And i know who the photographer is. Aria!!!!!!!

But looking at the next picture my smile faded. The picture was of me shaking hands with Tae. We both were looking at each other in the eyes. He was smiling a bit where I had no expression on my face.

Sometimes I think I've moved on, but no I didn't. I think it like this. Every time I look at him my heart beats harder against my ribcage. The emotions I've held inside me can never be healed no matter how much I try. I just can't. I've tried so many times but it's just I can never unlove this man even if I born thousands of times. Someone has said first love never dies.That's true.

I'm happy that he's happy. I'm sad because of me and my mistakes. I've imagined my whole life with him knowing that I'll get hurt eventually.

Does loving someone hurt this much?

My mom was right when she said Y/n. Don't forget your limits. Don't dream about something which can never happen.

She was right. She said that because she knew how much I love him. She knew everything. She knew that I'll get hurt eventually. That's why she always tried to make me understand. She never told me not to love him but not to hurt myself.

But i did.

A/N
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