My First Love

Chapter 20

CHAPTER TWENTY

Kiyoshi found a piece of paper lying on his bed when he returned home. As he neared it, he saw it was a letter. It was addressed to "My dearest Kiyoshi," so he immediately knew who it was from. He picked it up and began reading:

"My dearest Kiyoshi,

When I came into your house this morning, it wasn't to use the bathroom. It was to write and leave this for you. I have something important to tell you, and I just don't know how to say it to that adorable face of yours. I'm moving. You already knew that, but it turns out I'm leaving earlier than planned. Actually, I'm leaving this weekend. Today was our last day as a couple. I don't want my last memory of you to be our split, so next time I see you, I won't be seeing you as my boyfriend. You'll just be my friend. It's too hard to love you and leave you, so I can't love you anymore. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry I couldn't tell you this in person. I love you too much to do that. I love you so much. And I just can't love you now. Loving someone only leads to heartbreak. So from now on, we're over.

Sincerely,

Kaito White"

By the end of reading the letter, Kiyoshi was crying. That couldn't possibly be the end. But it was. Kaito had made that very clear. Their relationship had finished. When they saw each other the next day, they would just be friends. And that would be the last time they ever saw each other.

Kiyoshi picked up his cell phone and dialed Kaito's number. He held the phone up to his ear and waited for an answer. He was relieved to hear Kaito's voice coming from the phone.

"Hey! You've reached Kaito White's phone. I can't pick up right now, but..."

Kiyoshi frowned when he realized it was just voice mail. He tried calling again, but there was still no answer.

"Shit," he swore. "Why won't that bitch answer his phone?"

Kiyoshi knew there was no use getting angry. That would only make things worse. Kaito was leaving him, but it wasn't his fault. Kiyoshi shouldn't be angry.

But he was sad. He felt like part of himself was leaving. Like he had a hole in his heart that could never be filled. Because he knew no one could replace Kaito.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Kaito drove to school alone the next morning. He didn't want to see Kiyoshi, not now. He was afraid that he'd broken the boy's heart.

"But if I did, does he supposed I'm not broken, too?" Kaito thought to himself. "It took everything in me to write that letter. I only did it so that maybe it'd hurt less..."

Kaito didn't realize it, but tears had began rolling down his face. He imagined what it would've been like for them if he hasn't written that letter, but he would still have to leave. He would still have a broken heart.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

All throughout calculus class, Kiyoshi ignored Kaito. Kaito could see how he deserved it, a part of him just hoped it wouldn't be that way. That maybe Kiyoshi could be his friend, but only just a friend.

Kiyoshi didn't do much in any of his other classes. He remained silent and unsure. He didn't feel like himself. No, he wasn't himself. Kaito was a part of him, and with Kaito gone he could never be complete.

Only art class seemed to be an okay part of Kiyoshi's day. He got to spend the whole period painting, one of his favorite things to do. He often did it when he was trying to get other things off his mind. It really helped with the situation at hand.