" you know.." said Suga , a little while later as they were both sat next to each other on the sofa, him with his arm around her back and gently running his other hand up her bare leg as she sat with her legs over his .. " just so you know , I meant everything I said earlier . I'm not very good with expressing my own emotions on a one to one personal scale , and if Army or even my brothers could see me now I think I'd die of embarressment . It took a lot for me to tell you what I was thinking. I just wanted you to know "
She reached for his hand , " I know . Thank you " she said softly . She was fully aware she hadn't reciprocated his words , she just wasn't ready to put a label on what they had .
Suga admitted to feeling a little disappointed to himself , but she was here in his arms , that was enough for now . He sighed" I have to leave soon and go to work " he said . She jumped up " shit ! Me too what's the time ?"
" nearly 9 " he said pulling her back down onto his lap " I don't have to move just yet.? " he said suggestively. She laughed " you might not have to Mr idol superstar, but I do and if I haven't checked in by 9 I get docked wages "
He leant over and picked his phone up off the side " You know .. with one phone call I could have you to myself for as long as I wanted to?" She laughed but got off his lap " Don't you dare " she said , believe it or not my job is important to me "
This reminded him he'd had her demoted and his face clouded " And that's something else I need to apologise for too " he said . She waved her hand at him , " its all water under the bridge Ill make my way back to where I was, fair and square, I don't need any short cuts or preferential treatment from you just because we are well we are... together "
This made him smile , she had acknowledged they were together! . He jumped up and grabbed her around the waist.. "are you sure you cant stay a little longer ?" he said nuzzling her neck, but she swatted him away " behave , I still have to find clothes, I cant wear what I wore here last night they are still wet on your bathroom floor."
" Well personally I am a big fan of what you are already wearing " he said with a hungry grin.
" I need tracksuit pants on , I cant go around with my legs out , its not practical "
" You can borrow a pair of mine " he said quickly, he really didn't want her to go .
She laughed " I barely come up to your shoulders , they would fall off me . Now stop you're going to make me late , I just hope I can get back to my room with out being seen and that my room mates gone ". She stood on tiptoe and kissed him on the cheek " Let me know when you're free tonight and Ill come back , we still need to talk " She said smiling , and then she was gone.
Straight away he felt her absence. He walked over to the bathroom , to retrieve her wet clothes, he wasn't quite sure what to do with them and wondered how she would feel if he hand washed them and let them dry in his bathroom, but then the thought of one of his brothers ,who didn't know the meaning of personal space, seeing them had him bagging them up in a bag ready to ask her when he saw her .
The day dragged , he had been with his brothers since morning , they'd given an interview for a local television station, and then gone straight to the stadium. They'd eaten together in the green room and then prepared for the show. He'd caught glimpses of Teri through out the day but never close enough to say anything and more and more he wished he had kept her as his assistant.
After the show he kept trying to catch her eye but backstage was bedlam, and it was another 2 hours before he was back in his hotel room . He messaged her to come in 5 minutes, and then had a quick shower .
Wrapped in his boxer shorts and a white hotel towelling robe, he was still drying his hair when she knocked on his door.
Happiness, a feeling he had only ever before linked with his brothers and their group flowed through him as he opened the door .
As soon as they were alone he kissed her , he wrapped his arms around her and held her , kissing her over and over until she had to push at him and say " slow down tiger , I cant breath heheh "
He stepped back " sorry " he said , hoping she hadn't noticed his arousal . She had said she wanted to talk , he should slow down and let her . He rubbed at his hair again with the towel and walked over to the side , would you like a beer ? wine ? tea ?"
She took the towel off him and said " sit down , I know where the beers are, do you want one too ? " he nodded and said thanks , sitting on the backless stool in front of the mirror.
She handed him a beer and placed hers on the side, picking up his brush and hair drier. " let me " she said . Truth was she needed something to do with her hands , she had decided during the day that if they were even going to carry on sleeping together she didn't want another moment where she might freak out , after getting close to him again . So she was going to talk to him about it and maybe... big maybe... if she drunk enough maybe.. . show him. That way if he wanted to leave now he could before she got drawn to him more than she already was.
There was a companiable silence for about 5 minutes as Suga watched her in the mirrors reflection. The way she confidently wielded the brush and hairdryer was fascinating to watch... She seemed to be lost in her own thoughts and he wondered if he should say anything , but before he could she spoke " I've had this scar since I was 8 " she said , She spoke softly and her words only just audible above the whir of the hairdryer. He stared at her , she was still doing his hair but her face had taken on a look of ..sadness .. he didn't dare move, instead just waited.
" I was in a bad car accident with my mother and stepfather . My mother died , a piece of the glass windscreen entered my chest and apparently it was touch and go for a while . " Suga had to literally sit on his hands to stop him from reaching for her .. she continued " we didn't have money so I got the most basic of life saving treatments , and then was taken home " she gave a little awkward laugh and caught his eye in the mirror before quickly looking away " anyway back home I got a staff infection and it ate away at the scar making it worse . Luckily a neighbour heard me crying one day and came in to check on me . . Apparently " she said , trying not to get emotional " I nearly died a second time then . Unfortunately though once healed the scar looked horrendous and my body changed as I got older, it got even worse . " she'd stopped doing anything with his hair now , completely lost into herself , remembering the terrible words of her stepfather , the mocking words of children, her throat tightened with tears , but she was determined to hold them back . She forced a smile and said " there , your done " patting his shoulders, then reaching for her beer .
He let her have a mouthful before he turned and held her . " don't!" She said " don't pity me , you'll make me cry and I'm trying really hard not to " she said .
" I don't pity you " he said " I pity the little girl that you were and I admire the women that you are "
