mafias obsession(1st book in mafia obsession series)

chapter 18: Home, a place of safety

!Trigger warning!: this chapter contains sexual scenes

I had asked myself what love was good for, i had questioned what the point of it all was, i had wondered if there was anything love did other than bring you sadness and make you tired of life. As i thought about Lye, Sadie, Creed, Summer, Fern, Fynn, Liver, Blade and Zara, i realised that love wasn't just a negative thing that no one should want but something that could be beautiful and positive. It could be protective, caring and sweet. Romantic and platonic, obsession and friendship, all types of love had something positive to it. That didn't change the fact that love had it's negative sides but it did make it better, and that i was willing to live and stay for.

I needed to wake up. If not for me then for them. i had to open my eyes. i had to find a way. i didn't just need to but i wanted to. I wanted to for them. But what if they didn't want me anymore? what if me running away changed their mind about me? if they have changed their mind then what was truly the point of living anyway?

Wake up. huh? wake up. I turned around and saw a woman in white. "wake up" she said again and so suddenly i opened my eyes.

When i opened my eyes i saw Lye looking around the room and felt his hand against mine, i instantly tightened my hand around his and he looked at me with an expression of shock and instantly relaxed when he saw me give him a very soft and slight smile.

"i'm sorry.." my whisper was barely audible.

"you don't have to be sorry, i'm sorry for everything-"

"no" i cut him off, i wasn't going to have him apologise to me after everything he's done for me, i was so grateful for everything that he has done that not many others would have and there was no was in hell i would allow him to apologise for anything. "please don't apologise.." I felt like i was on the verge of a breakdown.

"come here" He stated as he pulled me into a much needed hug, i hugged him back breathing in his scent that for some reason helped calm me so much.

"how about we get you out of here and do something more enjoyable?" He asked and i nodded in response, needing to get out of this enclosed white room that people are supposed to feel safe in but just heavily triggers me instead.

He picked me up bridle style and i instinctively wrapped my arms around his neck.

"i can walk you know" i mumbled, trying to show that i wanted to walk but my body decided differently by leaning against his chest.

"if your complaining about being able to walk then i could always change that~" he whispered in my ear, making me turn bright red.

"i-" i couldn't form words.

"what sweetheart? don't think the possibility of a nurse or doctor walking in on us will stop me for putting you in your place~" His deep chuckle sent shivers down my spine.

Fuck, was i supposed to be this turned on right now? probably not but it's not my fault if he's being so hot. He knew what he was doing to me and it was clear by his smirk.

"fu fuck you" I managed to say.

"oh princess we both know it'll be me fucking you instead~" my blush got deeper at his statement.

"prove it" i dared, not knowing where my confidence had come from.

Suddenly my back was against the wall and he had his finger hooked under my chin.

"prove it hm~?" he teased making my confidence vanish as quickly as it had appeared.

"m mhm" i tried to look away but he kept a tight grip on my chin with his thumb and index finger.