mafias obsession(1st book in mafia obsession series)

chapter 37: i'd do anything for you

Was I prepared for this moment? Was I ok with being apart of something like that? Was this my destiny? Who knew?

Lye had taken me to a room of a house, the room confused me for a moment as it was simply what looked like a small meeting room with a door leading to somewhere.

"Sit" he commanded and I did so. "do you remember when you had seen the room filled with organs and blood?" How could I forget it? It was one of the moments still in the back of my mind every second of the day.

"Yes?" I wondered what the next thing he was going to say was.

"If I compared that to how dark everything else was that would be less than 1 percent of it" he stated. That room was pretty dark so how much darker was everything else?

"We have secrets darker than the night. We have more and more secrets every second of the day. Our organisation would put the horror movie business to shame." He took a moment to breathe "what I'm trying to say is the organisation is something a very very small amount of people could handle, hell alot of the time I wonder if even I can handle it. Once you join the only way to leave is through death or a very severe torture method. Some of the things that exist within the organisation would make you question reality, you would think your going crazy at the sight of it all." Everything he was saying sounded scary but that didn't make me want to change my decision.

"I'm sure you've heard of mafias, gangs, the underworld. What you've heard is nothing compared to reality. The lifestyle is torturous. There's no I don't want to do this or I don't want to do that. If you get told to do something you do it. This is all your decision sweetheart and you know I will always be by your side no matter what and support any decision you make. But I want you to think carefully before you make this one. Don't make it even if you have the slightest doubts" He seemed so worried for me. But I also knew that I wanted to embrace my darkness not be fearful of it.

"I know..but I truly am dead set on this decision..I already feel crazy, insane, like I'm a psychopath who needs to be locked up. I'd rather embrace it all rather than shut it away and have it all spilling out again" any time I had shut away any parts of my darkness it's like it came back angrier, wanting to take over. I wanted to allow it to take over.

Ever since I was a kid I had the darkness, I thought about murdering people, hell the whole reason my brother never had his father around was because I knew he was a bad person so threatened him away with a knife.

Why should I push away what was already apart of me? If I worked with it instead of working against it I could become stronger.

"Are you 100 percent sure about this decision mi amore?" He asked me softly.

"I'm sure" I answered

"There's a marking process you have to go through to join, it shows your determination for it. Although not everyone survives even the marking process" he explained.

What was the marking process? Was it like the process Harley Quinn went through?

Knowing things about the organisation it would be worst. Was I sure I was ready to go through with that? I nodded softly and took Lye's hand to wherever he was about to take me.