A Lover of Rain

CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN

CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN:

Cebu was meant to be a vacation with the ones that I love–to collect memories that will last in my heart forever, yet the only thing I collected was pain and loss. It was like the world turned around and being back inside our house in Manila was my vacation. The familiar sight of our small garden when you entered the gate. The white walls and homey vibes that come with the living room. Our kitchen where we'd gather to eat and tell each other about our day. Everything that comes with this house gives comfort in my heart.

I wheeled my luggage upstairs and when I opened my door, the light coming from the moon was illuminating my room. It was dark yet cozy to the eyes. I kicked my shoes away from my feet, leaving my luggage near the door as I walked to my bed to catch some sleep. But I froze.

As my eyes laid on my bed, I instantly remembered every touch and kiss Julian and I shared in my bed like a movie continuously playing in my head. I looked over to the side to distract myself from remembering it, yet I saw flashes of memories when we used to study for our exams together in my study table; encouraging the other when the road gets tough and reminding us about the dreams we were chasing. The laughter we shared echoes like a ghost inside this four-cornered wall that I never knew would haunt me. I got out of my room to drink some water. The longer I stay in my room, the more it would hurt. I opened the fridge but we still didn't have cold water yet since we turned off the electricity box when we left.

I decided to do something impulsive by going to a nearby convenience store which was a few blocks away. With a white hoodie and my wallet, I started walking alone on a quiet road at 2:30AM. The convenience store was ten minutes away from our house and I know I'm probably crazy for doing this, but I needed it. I needed to be alone. When I reached the convenience store to buy myself some drinks, I noticed someone with long hair and full bangs sitting alone and drinking away her sorrows with a bottle of soju.

I knocked on the glass to make Shay look at me. While I was making my way upstairs in the house, all of my friends had already entered their own room so I assumed they were taking a rest but here she was trying to make her problems go away with every sip of alcohol. Our eyes met, her stare was following me as I went inside the store to sit next to her.

"Alam kong sasabihin mo na dapat nagpaalam ako sa inyo at hindi ako basta bastang umaalis lalo na't madaling araw na." She couldn't even look me in the eyes after saying that. I grabbed a handful of chips that she was eating with her soju before shrugging. "I didn't say anything." I replied, munching the chips away like it was my money I bought it with. "But why are you here?"

"Why are you here?"

"You first." I said, not backing down.

Shay breathed out loud while her fingers started playing with the bag of chips by tugging it gently as a distraction from her feelings. "Hindi ako makatulog." She closed her eyes for a second, debating whether to rely her thoughts on me so I tapped her hand for support to let her know I was here for her.

"Nakita ko si Felix sa Cebu at nag-usap kaming dalawa." Her voice was trembling as she spoke. "I figured if we had a conversation then maybe things will change for the better. Kaya nakipag-usap ako sa kanya bago tayo umalis. Felix told me he was sorry for leaving when I needed him the most. He didn't know how to apologize at that time, so he tried to change into a better person hoping to tell me someday that I was the reason he became better."

"Masaya sya habang ako nadudurog." Shay started laughing while her tears were falling, "At nagpasalamat sya kasi ako yung dahilan kung bakit naging better boyfriend sya kay Kristin. Ayokong magmura pero putangina ang sakit sakit."

Shay covered her face but her hands kept trembling from the distress of a recent revelation about Felix. It's already fucked up he didn't fight with her during the hardest battle she's experienced yet, but to find out that your ex-boyfriend used you for a character development so he could be a better partner to someone he replaced you with? That's another level of fucked up I never knew was possible. "I'm gonna beat the shit out of Felix for you, I swear." I wrapped my arms around her to hopefully bring an inch of comfort in her misery. "You don't deserve to be treated that way."