burning bibles ; phan [COMPLETED]

♡ nutmeg ♡

6 months later

phil

elliot was annoying me. it was sunday night and we're about to close up. the music shop was empty and all i wanted to do was finish counting the cash box so we could leave. elliot had worked for the music shop for three weeks now and was doing fine. he was a fast learner and reliable which is why i convinced my manager, stella to hire him.

stella's mom was sick and she needed extra help with the store so hiring a new guy was the obvious choice. except we didn't realize how needy elliot was. he couldn't do anything by himself or without checking with me to make sure it was done correctly. sometimes it was okay, and other days he got to be too much. i needed him to things on his own.

when james and i left fallenview, it took me awhile to get my life back together. james moved me into his apartment in the spare bedroom and for the first few weeks i couldn't move. it felt like when dan left for his grandparents all over again. dan called a lot at first which helped. i missed his voice already and he told me i needed to start my new life and he would be with me after school ended. finally, i agreed.

james helped me get my GED and start college classes for education and english. i was doing classes at night mostly while i worked at stella's vinyl, which was a music shop close to james and i's apartment. i wrote dan a letter telling him all of this. he wrote one back very excited for me and told me we was so excited to be done with school. i wished i could see him graduate, or graduate with him. but i couldn't.

stella promoted me to assistant manager after a couple months when she notice how much i was putting into the job. really it was the best distraction for me to not think of dan, to not think of my old life. and now elliot was my project, i was trying to make him not as needy. he needed me for everything, reassurance on every step to make sure it was correct. elliot was a lot.

i missed dan desperately. it was all i could think about, and everywhere i looked he was there. his eyes were in my morning coffee. his smile was in the black sabbath songs stella put on the record player in the store on saturday mornings. his touch was in my velvet blankets i pushed on my face to fall asleep. his cinnamon smell was in the bakery i passed everyday walking to work. dan was everywhere.

it was better when we talked less. after a couple phone calls, dan wrote me a letter a month after i left. he told all the crap they did to matty to get him to transfer school and how him and joe were becoming friends. he told me how louise and pj started dating and zoe and alfie were finally an official couple. things were good for him at home. i wished i was there. it was better when i didn't have hear about it.

he called me when he graduated telling me he need sometime to save money to come visit me. i called him on his birthday and sung happy birthday to him a million times on the phone. he kept telling me he would be with me as soon as he could. but months were going by. i tried to be patient but i was starting to give up. i cried to james about it, mourning dan even though i hadn't lost him yet. i just needed him to be with me, for a second. that's all i wanted. i had to start giving up, pushing him out my head thinking he was never going to come. it was july now and i figured he wasn't coming. elliot was my distraction, i just started focusing on how to get him to do shit on his own and not ask me for help every second.

i told him to finish cleaning up the shop while i counted the cash in the back office. but i heard the bell on the front door ring. i cursed under my breath knowing someone just walked in two minutes before closing and elliot was about to freak out.