~as if~

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i can still feel their hands
touching me everywhere
i can still hear their voices
mocking my body, my clothes
degrading me
their hands groped and grabbed
as if i was theirs
as if they were entitled to have me
while i begged them to stop
i was sunk to the ground
settled below them
vulnerable and so utterly defenseless
i could do nothing but take it
as i felt the words, the begs, die at my mouth
when i started dissociating
funny how familiar it all felt
and different as the same time
i was supposed to be older
i was supposed to be able to stop them
i can hear their words breaking into my soul
tearing me apart even more
when i thought the pieces couldnt be found
they were found once again
just to be shattered even more
my body is no longer mine
having been touched by many
i feel disgusted and yet i have to move on
doing as if it doesnt faze me at all

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