DNF - A Formula 1 Story (Lando Norris)

Chapter 24

"And although my dream was overdue, your love made it well worth waiting for someone like you." - Dean Martin

Bianca

I feel like I'm going to vomit as I watch the screens around me of the race. There is so much water on the track and it doesn't look like the rain is going to stop anytime soon based on the doppler images they keep showing on the screens. The two orgasms from earlier this morning are not doing their magic at keeping me relaxed like they did earlier. My anxiety that I've been feeling ever since I found out the forecast late last night has come back full force and I'm desperately trying to stay calm but can't. Morgan is standing beside me and looking at me with concern but I try to ignore her.

"Bianca, darling, why don't you sit down with me on the couch?" Cisca asks me, pulling me from the tv screens. We're in the hospitality area above the garage so there's many places to sit but I've been too anxious to sit so I've been standing. More like pacing. I know I'm being kind of insane but I've seen videos of Lando's crash here from 2021 and it was terrifying to watch. The way I felt when I watched it was gutwretching and that was before we even ever started dating. I can't even think about how it would feel watching something like that happen now. I want to tell Cisca no but I don't. Instead I find my way to sit beside her and once I sit she grabs my hands into hers and squeezes tightly.

"Does it ever get easier?" I ask, knowing she'll know what I mean. She's been watching him race forever. She looks at me sympathetically and shakes her head.

"No, not really. It's the unfortunate part of this job." She sighs as she looks back to the tv screen. I'm still looking at her.

"I'm not sure if I can handle this. I'm so terrified I'm going to lose him." I whisper sadly and her eyes find mine again.

"Why do you love my son?" She asks me with curiousity and I furrow my brows at the seemingly random question. It takes me a moment to gather my words to describe why I love her son.

"I love his determination and dedication, that once he makes his mind up about something he's going to make it happen no matter how hard he has to try or how long it takes. I love how selfless he is when it comes to his friends and family and how he just wants to take care of everyone. I love his sense of humor, no one makes me laugh like he does and I've never had more fun with someone than I have with him. I pretty much love everything about him besides how he never seems to know you're supposed to put your dirty clothes into the hamper, not on the floor." I tell her and she smiles knowingly at me.

"No matter how many times I got on him about that they always ended up on the floor. It's kind of nice knowing things haven't changed that much." She says and we laugh.

"Look Bianca, I know that it's terrifying thinking of potentially losing him but that risk is true for any relationship. Accidents happen everyday, although I suppose this sport has a higher probability of accidents than other professions. But racing makes him fundamentally who he is and from what I just heard it seems like you think he's pretty wonderful the way he is. The way I see it is you're going to worry regardless of if he's driving cars at 200mph or just walking down the street. This anxiety you're feeling is because you love him and that's never going to go away." She stops and turns away briefly when there's a radio message coming in from Lando about the amount of water on the track and I try to calm my breathing at the instant pit in my stomach. Luckily he doesn't sound too stressed, more annoyed than anything. Once the message stops Cisca returns her gaze to mine.

"I'm willing to bet that you believe he's worth the stress you feel in this moment and if given the choice to stay or walk away you would stay. I can see it when you look at him how much love and devotion you have for him and you just have to remember that he feels the same for you. He's going to do everything in his power to make it home for you. I know it's not the best advice but it's all I have." She says with moisture in her eyes and I realize I also have moisture in mine too. We both quickly wipe it away and chuckle at our emotional conversation. Silently we watch the race for a few minutes before I turn back to her.