Submissive Husband

27.Bright - what did i do wrong

Bright

It's getting weird,  it's been a while after we attended gulf birthday party. Phi mile look different. I dont know why but I can feel it. He also acting weird especially this week. Something must be wrong.

Can I hug you, phi mile ask me .
I roll my eyes. I say no everytime he ask, but he just hug me. Can I bright, phi mile ask again. No, I reply as usual. Phi mile look a bit down but he really back off this time and sit on the couch. I look at him and start feeling uncomfortable.  What going on. Sit down bright, we need to talk, phi mile said. Even I am full of curiosity,  I walk to phi mile and slowly sit beside him. Phi mile calmly hand over a envelope.  I look at phi mile eyes before open the envelope.  I felt like I cant breathing. I look at phi mile eyes deeply. I am looking for answer. I am sorry, It's been a while, I am sorry that I can't fully my promise before he said slowly. I felt a bit dizzy.  After all this time,  phi mile suddenly bring our divorce agreement.  Okay, I said and slowly walk to our room. I am still shocked and confused.  What going on, why so sudden after I felt comfortable with my new life. I think I even love him.  Win scold me for being stupid after I announce how I want to fall in love. He scold me for break phi mile heart. That the moment I realize I want to fall for phi mile but he start to distancing himself. This is nightmare, I will just sleep and everything will back as usual .

Its  not  a dream. I am now at my own apartment.  I still  cant forget phi mile look when he send me here last week. He act like usual. Calm and gentle. Until last moment he treat me like, I am the most valuable thing he ever have. I must be dreaming.  It just my assumption.  I am no body in phi mile life.  I start receiving new offer and what not. But I am still here regretting my destiny. I am blessed with good look but not love. I will choose love if I can choose.  Stop crying bright, he already move on I said .
You are no body. But I cant hold my tears when I see phi mile attend the big event with beautiful lady. They are on every news . You know this since day one.  Why being pathetic I ask myself.  I slowly wear off my ring. I put in my accessories box. I can see the ring mark. Since my retirement, this is the first time I put off my ring and its forever. Again all I can do is crying.

Win and gulf now become my guest everyday. Both of them are worried.  They are suprise on how I am at my apartment back. Then when they saw the news both of them come running to me. Both of them really love me. I try to be strong. I dont cry or act pitiful.  I dont want to be their burden. They are new happy couple. So I act like everything are planned.  But my two best friend Still visit me from time to time.
You should accept the offer, win said. I just smile and look at the good script send to me.
I don't think I am ready for that, I said. Why, win ask. I dont know, I just want to live quietly , I said. How about this, when will you legalised your divorce, win ask me and show me my divorce documents. 
I don't know, I need to wait for phi mile. He is busy right now, I said. Actually I can do it myself,  but I don't have a strenght for that. So I used phi mile as an excuse. Bright, you know you can talk to us right, gulf ask me softly. He still believe phi mile love me. I nearly choke to death when he told me that.  Is he crazy,  he still believe that after phi mile give me the divorce paper. I know he is innocent but not this naive.

There is no love from the start. Phi mile is very manipulative.  There must be a reason why he act like he love me for real and being very innitiative.  He just act for what ever reason that only he knew. It just me, being stupid to fall for someone powerful like him. There is no way for him to fall in love for someone plain like me. If I want to get angry, I need to angry with myself for being stupid.
How could he pretend to be a loving husband and throw me a divorce paper overnight. He even hug me when he send me home. I know someone with high status like him won't love me but how could he do this to me. That the only regret that I have. I really want to ask  the reason but like always everything is decided by phi mile. I cant say or do anything. 

No,i prefer this peacefulness right now. I gently reject all the offer I have. I think I will crazy if I dont do anything.  So now I am at Korea. Travelling without any purpose . I just want to run from my situation.  I need to distance myself with anyone who know me. I just want to be alone. I look at the view from my bed. I like it here, surround by beautiful nature and I felt a bit peace. I am happy with my new environment.  I make a friend with older and new neighbours I have. It's small village at jeju island.
Its a very calm month for me. I try my best to forget everything.  But deep inside I still don't felt peace. I want to know, what is my fault.  I try my best to be invisible for years and live quietly. why he bring me to his life.  What did I do wrong for him to hurt me like this. He not only destroy my career but my life.