Incorrect Fantastic Beasts

001

Newt: .....why do you have a copy of my wanted poster framed in your living room

Theseus: because it's bloody hilarious

Theseus: it says 'most menacing and extremely dangerous'

Theseus: it's sort of like seeing a fluffy bunny with a spiked collar

Newt:...I hate you so much

--------

Newt: magical creatures? no I haven't seen any-

Newt: *niffler falls out of back pocket*

Newt: *a dozen bowtruckles slide out of left sleeve*

Newt: *three hundred murtlaps, four ashwinders, anda million beasts spill out of suitcase*

Newt:

Newt: look I can explain

-------

Grindelwald: What makes Albus Dumbledore so fond of you?

Newt: ...Um, I... Im not really sure what you mea...

Grindelwald: *interrupting* No seriously. Like, is it the hair? Because I can dye mine back if he prefers it that way.

Newt: ....

Grindelwald: Or perhaps he admires the slight wave in it?

Newt: ....

Grindelwald: Ugh, my hair was wavy before I dyed it. Bleach really damages hair, Newt

Newt: ...

Grindelwald: Or is it your fashion sense he appreciates?

Newt: ....

Grindelwald: Hmm, no. Albus always loved my leather heels and *swooshes coat* fitted trenches

Newt: Um, im just unsure why this is relevant?

Grindelwald: *whispers* I'm very gay, Newt

-------

Dumbledore: Gellert?! What are you doing here?

Grindelwald: I came to find more followers.

Dumbledore: In Hogwarts?

Grindelwald: Yes.

Dumbledore: In my room?

Grindelwald: Yes.

Dumbledore: Oh, so that's why you are lying in my bed completely naked.

Grindelwald: Exactly.

-------

Newt: [petting a Graphorn]Jacob: Uh... Whatcha got there?Newt: *holds up a cup with a bendy straw* A smoothie.