Pjsk Oneshots (rarepairs 😈)

💔Ruikasa - Your pain

I felt an angsty mood coming today so I wrote these two.
What if rui kamishiro's feelings went down an unhealthy path bc they met in middle schoolll
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🎈🌟
Rui stood at his door, watching Tsukasa sleep. Tsukasa had always looked so peaceful when he slept. It was beautiful. I wish he could always be like this, peaceful. It would hurt Rui deeply seeing him in so much pain. Tsukasa always acted so strong too, he needed someone to be stronger for him. Rui felt he needed to be stronger than him. Maybe that was his place in Tsukasa's heart. Rui tucked him into bed, looking around at his room. For some reason Rui wondered if he was just as important as some of your favorite things. Or if his efforts were recognized at all.

He didn't care if they were though. His thought process about Tsukasa changed...

Tsukasa's pain is Rui's pain. Rui cared for him, he truly does. He needed to do things for him. He wanted to anyways, so it was fine. Nobody else seems to be doing so. He wants to, so how could that hurt Tsukasa? Rui wants to help him. Tsukasa was important to him. He was one of a kind to Rui.

A few months past...

Tsukasa's pain became just as important as Rui's pain. He felt it at night, when Tsukasa called him and he was hurting. Rui felt it all the time when Tsukasa was suffering. Just a subtle change in his behavior, that's how tuned Rui was to him. It's like an aching deep inside, the tears threatening his eyes. It felt so unbearable to see Tsukasa like that.

A few months more had past...the two had gotten even closer

Rui had started to want Tsukasa's pain for himself. Just so he could live another second in peace. Rui wanted to hold his hand and tell him everything was alright. He doesn't want Tsukasa to force himself to do anything. He wanted Tsukasa to be true to himself. Rui wanted to lift the burden of all of Tsukasa's pain. He could do it. He knew he could. He was just being a good friend after all.

And now...what Rui felt....

He needed Tsukasa's pain. Seeing Tsukasa happy makes Rui happy. If Tsukasa was happy, Rui was happy. He was the cause of Rui's happiness so in return Rui wanted to carry all of the burdens Tsukasa kept deep in his heart. It's just what anyone would want right? Why would he not give that to someone? If Tsukasa was happy, He also was happy with Rui. Then..Tsukasa wouldn't even think twice about leaving Rui. Right?

So Rui stood by Tsukasa's side, thinking of anything more to help him. He would be brave for Tsukasa...even if he felt a little scared.

. . .

Rui had always suspected he wasn't enough for Tsukasa.

"Rui, we should go our separate ways. This is nothing personal, it's just for the best."

Those words echoed in Rui's mind over and over again. He had done EVERYTHING for him. He did everything right. He made sure Tsukasa was always loved and cared for? What did he do wrong? Didn't Rui do everything right? What did he mean it was for the best.

...Maybe Rui was selfish. He thought that maybe if he had done all of that, Tsukasa would be kind to him. No. This wasn't kind.

It almost made him a little angry. Almost.

Just then..he had realized it all..the betrayal...wasn't betrayal at all. This was Rui's fault. How could he be so stupid?! Maybe he wasn't the best at friendships after all. Maybe he got something wrong along the way.

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633 words
I kinda wanted this to be more vague? If this makes sense?