close to my dialling heart

40🌹(no title) 😭

🎶Darling hold my hand. Oh. Won't you hold my hand? 'Cause I don't wanna walk on my own anymore. Won't you understand? 🎶
                       ~Jess Glyn~

DOVE 🕊

My weekend was something.

As I sat alone in the empty classroom, I focused on the assignment in front of me. The silence was a welcome change from the day's chaos. Suddenly, Noelle's voice broke the calm. "Hey, you!" she called out, her tone playful.

I jumped slightly, then smiled and waved her over. "Why can't you be hyper for once?" she teased, pulling up a chair beside me.

I just smiled, not ready to share my weekend adventures. Noelle's curiosity was piqued. "Where were you this weekend? I came by twice and didn't find you."

My smile grew, but I stayed quiet, memories of the weekend still fresh in my mind. Noelle's eyes narrowed slightly. "You were with him, weren't you?" she asked, her voice low and curious.

I bit my tongue, the secret burning inside me. Noelle's eyes sparkled with curiosity, her gaze intense. "Just tell me who he is?" she pressed, her voice tinged with excitement. I couldn't utter a word, the truth still surreal even to myself. His name lingered on the tip of my tongue, but I couldn't bring myself to say it aloud.

Noelle's guess made me gasp. "Is it Tristan?" My heart skipped a beat at the mention of that name. I shook my head, and Noelle's face scrunched up in disappointment. "What? Tristan is a good guy. Okay, then, who is it?" she whined, her tone playful yet persistent.

I took a deep breath, the secret threatening to spill out. Finally, I whispered his name: "Xavier." My heart somersaulted like a trapeze artist, the thrill of revelation coursing through my veins.

Noelle's silence was palpable, a heavy stillness that filled the air. I didn't mind, though, as I was stuck in a trance, my eyes fixed on the same word, my brain struggling to process the sudden interruption. Finally, Noelle broke the silence, her voice laced with disbelief. "Xavier?" She whispered the name, as if it was a sacred secret.

I lifted my gaze from my book, meeting Noelle's stunned expression. Her eyes were wide, her mouth agape, as if she'd just witnessed a miracle. I nodded, a small smile playing on my lips. "Oh, I'm sure he isn't the same Xavier I know," she stammered, her tone laced with skepticism.

I chuckled, my eyes drifting back to my assignment, my mind whirling with the possibilities. "What if it is?" I asked, my voice barely above a whisper, the question hanging in the air.

"No, it can't be," Noelle said, her voice in disbelief. "The Xavier I know wouldn't date someone like you..." She paused, and I felt a pang of defensiveness, but she quickly added, "as in, not in a bad way, but it's because of you. You wouldn't date someone like the Xavier I know." I smiled wryly, thinking about how true that was. I never thought I'd end up with someone like Xavier, but life had other plans.

"And the Xavier I know is Korean," Noelle added, a hint of a chuckle in her voice. I raised an eyebrow, intrigued. She paused, studying me for a moment before continuing, "He's my ex." Her smile was laced with a mix of nostalgia and wariness. "I still like him, even though he was so toxic. But I'm the problem. I like toxic guys." She sighed, her eyes gazing off into the distance, as if lost in thought.

I leaned in, my curiosity piqued. "Why did you break up?" I asked, trying to sound nonchalant despite my growing unease. A part of me was screaming that it couldn't be the same Xavier, that there were plenty of Korean Australians with that name. But another part of me, the part that had seen the way Noelle's eyes clouded over when she mentioned him, knew better.