Her Best Second Chance

Chapter 20: Dwelling

~Solayne's POV~
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Two weeks later

I skim through the pages of the album full with old photos of us. Coming across our graduation picture, my thumb glide over it remembering the contents of that day.

Slightly smiling to myself , a single string of tear escapes from my eyes falling onto the photo. Wiping my face, I inhale a sharpe breath closing album.

'How did we get to this point?'

Staring at the album which held most of our childhood and experiences. My nail digs at edges feeling trapped in a spiral haunted by what is now mere memories of what we had.

"How could I be so selfish?"

I never once imagined us ever breaking apart and although all this deemed to be my fault I couldn't help but dwell in regret and anger as I am yet to accept her reasoning for leaving despite me not being a good friend to her.

I could feeling the tears forming again but I didn't want to cry today, I couldn't. Locking myself in and keeping away from others isn't healthy. Gosh I couldn't tell the last time I felt fresh air in my lungs.

I know I have been such a bad person and friend to the persons who needed me the most so probably I did deserve this but I can't keep punishing myself any longer. The past is the past and I can't keep dwelling in it and stealing my present.

Grabbing my car keys from the counter, I step outside for the first time in days.

I am done allowing my circumstance to have the better of me. This is my life and I dictate how I live it and frankly that isn't locking myself inside crying day and night over something I caused.

Closing up I saunter down the corridor nearing his front door. Stopping just in front it I stare at the door wondering if he is inside. Sighing I attempt to knock but stop.

Apart of me wanted to see him but the other part strongly resented him for throwing me out and always ruining things for me.

Looking at my fist inches away from his door I take a deep breath deciding against it.

'He probably doesn't even want anything to do with me so what's even the point?' Allowing my hand to fall to my side I slowly step away looking once more at the closed door before continuing outside.

Ridding my mind from the thoughts of him, I unlock my baby seeing it parked and ready for me.

The engine rumbles to life, instantly calming my mind making me feel at peace something I haven't felt in a long while.

Making myself comfortable, I steer out of the complex and unto the main road driving to the nearest phone shop.

I am extremely short on funds right now but it's about time I replace my phone. I can't afford my recent one so I opted for something cheaper and usable.

~*~

Driving around town I ended up at a skating rink in down town Kingston. Smiling, I check the time to see 6:48 on my screen.

"Where did my day go?" I question a bit surprised at the time. Locking up I walk into the place my insides bubbling with joy as my inner child jolted awake.

Throughout today I found myself doing activities I usually do with Myra for some odd reason and I am just now recognizing it.

We both use to come to this place regularly in our  prime years and here I am again, but this time is rather different because she isn't here.