Yujin was in Jaebum's home, sitting on his couch, and staring at him while he worked in the kitchen to make hot drinks. He knew very well it was her comfort drink, because so many times has she went to the place he worked and ordered hot cocoa while he was working. Yujin was brought back to childhood when she drank it, because back then there was nothing to worry about. Everything about life was simpler when she was younger, even when she was a teenager. When Yujin had just met Mark, and they would hang out everyday after school, those were good days. Just thinking about it made her feel more empty, she brought her knees up to her chest and closed her eyes. There were no sounds in the house, just the occasional footsteps of the male wandering through the kitchen. There was no one here except the two of them, and it made her stop and really appreciate him. Jaebum was someone who always was there, even when she wasn't self aware that she needed him at all. He himself was a way for her to become happier than she already was. Peeking an eye open, she glanced at him, at his backside as he was now mixing hot water into the mugs. Yujin let her body calm down, let her heart stop pounding in her chest, let her eyes stop blinking away the tears that were left, let her fingers stop clenching themselves into fists, and let her breathing become irregular. Though her stomach still twisted itself into knots, that made her feel sick, made her feel hopeless, like she was in a tunnel slowly closing around herself. That wasn't a good feeling, it was a bottomless pit she was to fall down for hours until something shocked her enough to draw her out of it.
"Here you are, just how you like it." Jaebum spoke, returning to the scene, holding two cups in his hand, holding one out for the girl to take. It only took a few seconds, as she let go of her knees and reached out for it. Their fingers brushed over one another just softly, and she sighed quietly. She was still so angry, so confused, so frustrated. Jaebum took a seat next to her, letting the girl slightly slump over and lean her head against his shoulder, because he knew how she always needed comfort like this. He didn't dare say a word, because her soft ragged breathing and quivering lip did all the talking for them. Yujin softly blew on her drink, watching as it was pushed to one side with her quick breathe. Taking a small sip of it, she frowned a bit when it burnt her tongue, though it was really her fault because she didn't wait. She knew she herself was impatient, that all things could be avoiding or fixed with time. Glancing up at Jaebum, she studied him. He was quiet, his breathing just gently making a stir in the silence. He leaned his head back, letting it rest on the back of the couch, and he closed his eyes. She figured he was thinking, so she set her cup down, and began to think more.
She was so lost in love, that she didn't seem to be able to find the problem before. Staring down at the floor, she thought. Maybe the fact Yugyeom didn't trust someone she was most close to really hurt them both, maybe this was all a mistake. Maybe Yujin shouldn't have kept her hopes up and started to love Yugyeom, maybe it was destined for him to hurt her anyways. She didn't realize it, but she was crying, just crying, tears streaming down her face and landing on her lap in tiny little drops. Yujin took a deep breath, releasing it shakily. Jaebum opened his eyes, glancing to the side and watching her cry, because he knew she needed to be able to let it all out.
"Are you going to tell me what happened?" He whispered, wrapping his arm around her back and waiting calmly. At the kindness she was shown, she only nodded, leaning closer to him until she was almost hugging him. How was she supposed to explain this?
"Yugyeom, said he was only dating me because he didn't trust you..." Yujin murmured, pulling at his arm softly, her eyes traveling to his hand and resting there on his tattoos. She kept forgetting he had them, but she would always remember where they were if she really thought about it.
"I thought Yugyeom would be over it by now..." Jaebum said simply, his hand rubbing at her back softly, easing her further into comfort before letting out a sigh. "It was because of his sister right? It wasn't my intention to hook up with another girl at the same time, but with a little alcohol what was I supposed to do. I couldn't tell up from down, and she seemed to think I was the one who wanted the girl I met just that night. I really liked her, his sister. She just never listened to me, so really. Wasn't it her who hurt herself the most?" Yujin looked at his face, to see he was already looking at her intently.
"Did you sleep with that girl? Is that why she was mad?"
"I don't remember much from that night, but I know I didn't sleep with her. I won't deny I didn't touch her, I acknowledge my mistake, but she didn't even let me say sorry, she just left... So, that's why Yugyeom hates my guts." Jaebum explained, stroking his fingers through Yujin's hair and humming gently. "I know you don't want to hear it, but what he said to me when I met you, he was really something. He kept telling me, if I ever looked at you as someone more than a friend I will make sure she won't be able to return the feelings. I'll break your heart like you broke my sisters." Jaebum trailed off, causing Yujin to close her eyes and shake her head.
"So, he really only dated me because he didn't want you to?"
"Sounds like that to me. He hated me, so much. He still does, but I know he treasures you."
"He fucked up." She murmured, making Jaebum laugh softly.
"Anyone that loses you really fucks up." He said, glancing over to the side, looking at the girl. Yujin smiled at that, looking back up at him, and they just looked for a while. Yujin couldn't understand why it felt like this, why she had brand new butterflies in her stomach. Jaebum understood it too well, he knew why his heart raced.
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a/n : i wrote this in 30 mins for my babe oka.
like stress
but omg so cute
holy shit its almost 5PM
i finished at 4:59 PM HELL YEA
ugh ugh okay. okay. fucking love pairing though
pls comment.
YOU ARE READING
Love Without Love
Fanfictioneven when we were teenagers, i looked at him. even now we're adults, i can't seem to stop. because he, is perfect.
