Dangerous Lines | Yuzuru Hanyu

9. Control

It was during one of her usual morning sessions that Yaeko got suggested something that seemed a lot of fun.

One of the girls who always studied there, Miko, waved at her as she left a bit earlier than usual.

"I'm going to skate for a bit." She admitted, "It's always nice to forget a bit about the studies, you know?"

Yae didn't really understand, but at the same time, part of her was very curious about the whole thing.

"I have never tried it"

Admitting it out loud was probably more embarrassing than it should have been. No one is obviously obligated to have experienced everything in life but the truth was that she felt that feeling way too often.

"You should!"

Just as she was about to answer the girl and before she knew it, the owner of the shop, Nakayama-san, quickly interrupted the conversation.

"That's such a great idea! Sendai is known for its amazing skaters too!"

"Oh really?"

"We have two Olympic medalists from here."

The pride that the city had in its own citizens was admirable. This was something uncommon to find in Tokyo and she found it very endearing.

Hearing the word Skating made her think of him right away. Yaeko had long accepted the effect the man had on her but being reminded of that still surprised her every time.

"That's very cool!"

"You know what? You should come!"

While everything in her head went against that suggestion, there was something so inherently captivating about skating that she couldn't avoid. The excitement that rose to her skin from the moment she thought about it was the perfect proof that she wanted it badly.
But would it even be a good idea?

"That's an amazing idea" Nakayama-san was quick to say, way too cheerful for Yae's taste.

"I don't know... my husband..."

Yeah, to those who didn't know who she was, the mention of her husband in a situation like this was alarming, and even if she hoped that the detail had gone unnoticed, it was highly unlikely that she would succeed.

"What is it with this husband of yours? Is he that controlling?"

There was no way she could escape it now. The women present in the shop were way to wary of her now and her marital situation.

"He just doesn't like me going around dangerous places."
The excuse was poor at best and everyone in that room knew it, including Yaeko. Even so, none of the ladies there seemed to be convinced with her excuses. Still, they just seemed to jointly agree to let it go and allow her to give that excuse.

"Well, he isn't here to see, is he?"

It was dangerous, falling into a world of what he didn't know couldn't hurt, not because of what she could get herself into, but rather how Kiyoshi could react if he ever found out. One single step in the wrong way and she wouldn't just be placing herself in danger but also everyone else around her.

They couldn't possibly know what they were getting themselves into and in a way, it was up to Yaeko to protect them in the best way she could, especially after growing quite fond of them in the past days.

Inside her head was an inner fight: Go and try to relax her stance about this or be the bad one and just go back to her life, alone and bored to death as it had been usual for such a long time.

Yet, even when she thought it would be possible to ignore all the excitement, Yaeko realized that she couldn't spend her whole life awaiting permission to do the things she enjoyed, especially when it was just some casual hang out with a friend.

She should be allowed that, right?

So maybe for the first time since she married, Yaeko did something because she wanted to and not purely out of fear of her husband's reaction. She said yes to the invitation and found herself following dutifully behind Miko.

There was no denying how much anticipation seemed to be running through her veins. Yaeko loved the idea even before trying the whole thing.

The walk to that very same place was short but just as enjoyable as any experience in the city until that point. She was growing more and more used to being surrounded by the beautiful trees and nature that so well represented that place.

Miko was even cooler than she anticipated. In a way, Yae saw a lot of her past self in the other girl, ambitious and willing to make every effort to achieve her dreams. The one key difference was that this girl was allowed to go to university while she had other obligations to fulfill.

The building didn't look too big but it was purely an aesthetic remark. Since it served a very purposeful duty, it shouldn't even be a beautiful place.

Once they entered the reception and Miko started getting everything sorted for their ice time, Yaeko found herself in complete shock once again.

You see, the last thing she ever expected was to see a giant human-sized cardboard figure of a man she had been lusting for.

Her breathing quickened right away and she even suspected that her cheeks had a slight tinge of crimson in them. If she reacted this way to a mere cardboard, she wondered what the real effect would be if she saw him in person again.

Not that she wanted to find out...
Or at the very least, that's what she told herself.

Yuzuru Hanyu was this unattainable figure that her mind and body has grown fond of.

So if she was ever to think of it as something more, it was mere hopeful thinking. There wasn't a single world in which he would look in her way and certainly not one where she could allow it.