From Knives to Pens

From Knives to Pens - Chapter 32

A/N: I'm kind of freaking out because we are so close to eight hundred reads! I never expected to get this much support and I want to thank everyone for reading what I've written, it's crazy! The votes are now past seventy and I'm blown away! Apologies for writing such a boring chapter but they are going to get more interesting! As always comment your thoughts on the story so far and notify me of any mistakes. Thanks! Ciara x

Chapter 32 Andy’s POV:

I watch as Willow clings to her brother, a deep sadness overwhelming me. Neither of them deserves this. They’ve been through so much already.

Willow’s Mum looks so ill and distant that it makes my eyes dampen at the sight. If my Mum was suffering as Willow’s Mum is now I would be a mess. I’m amazed at how strong Willow is being and I admire her for her courage. She’s truly an inspiration.

Quietly, so as not to disturb Willow and Zack, I leave the room. They need some time alone with their Mum. I sit on the red fabric chairs outside of the room and take out my phone. I have three missed calls from Jinxx and Sammi. I sigh knowing they will want to know how Willow and Zack are holding up and I don’t have anything good to tell them.

I call them back, knowing I can’t avoid them forever. Sammi picks up on the first ring.

“Andy?” She asks.

“Yep.” I sigh, preparing for the onslaught of questions.

“Thanks for finally returning my call! I’ve been trying to contact you since Jake told us what happened! Is everything ok?” Sammi says. She barely pauses between words she’s so worried.

I close my eyes and lean back in my chair. An image of Willow’s grief stricken face comes into mind and my eyes dampen. I hate seeing her look so lost and broken. “Everything’s gone wrong. Willow and Zack are struggling. They’re with their Mum now and the last I saw they were in tears by her bed.” I say sadly.

I hear Sammi take a sad intake of breath. “What did the doctor say?”

“He said that her Mum’s broken ribs and punctured lung should heal fine, the only problem is the damage to her brain. The doctor said that she’ll be lucky if she only escapes with severe memory loss.” I reply. Sammi gasps.

“That’s devastating! How are they going to cope? They haven’t got their Father around to help!” Sammi says, sounding horrified.

“I don’t know. Willow and Zack are so tough but this is going to destroy them.” I whisper.

“It’s so unfair! Why can’t they have some luck for once?” She says angrily.

“I know where you’re coming from. I wish there was something I could do to make this easier.”  I say.

Sammi thinks for a moment. I can almost hear the cogs turning in her brain. After a moment she speaks. “Did you bring anything with you from America? Clothes and things?” Sammi asks.

I slap a hand to my forehead. “Crap! We were in such a rush that I completely forgot! All of Willow’s and Zack’s things are at home!” I exclaim. “I’m going to have to come back and get them.”

“No you don’t! You need to stay with Willow and Zack.” Sammi says sternly. I begin to protest but she cuts me off. “Jinxx and I will bring them over. We’ll stay in England for a while. I want to be there for you guys. You’re going to need the support.”

This all sounds too good to be true. “Are you sure?”

“Yes! Me and Jinxx have nothing planned and I will feel really guilty if we don’t even try to help you out.” Sammi explains. “We’ll be over in the morning.”

“Thanks Sammi.” I say. “I really appreciate it.”

“It’s nothing!” She says. I can hear the smile in her voice. “I’ll see you soon.”

I hang up just as Willow comes out of the hospital room. Her eyes are bloodshot from the tears. I open my arms and she walks over to me. She sits on my lap and curls up to my chest. I stroke her silky black hair soothingly.

“Are you ok?” I ask her quietly. It’s a stupid question. Of course she’s not ok, her Mum’s in hospital!

“I’m as good as I can be in this situation.” Willow says softly.

“You’re amazing, you know that right?” I whisper, kissing the top of her head lightly.

She shakes her head. “I should have stayed home and not gone to LA and this wouldn’t have ever happened.” She rises from her seat on my lap and starts pacing the hallway. I look at her in shock. She can’t blame herself for this.

“Willow, don’t you dare. You know you couldn’t have stopped this from happening, even if you did stay.” I say, rising and going to her. I take her hand in mine and pull her to a stop. She looks up at me, tears in her eyes.

“She was on her way home from work Andy! She wouldn’t have to work if I hadn’t lost my job!” She answers angrily.

“I know you feel guilty, but I know in your heart you understand that you aren’t to blame. No one is. This is an unfortunate accident.” I say tenderly. Willow looks away.

“At least if I stayed in England I could have been by her side quicker instead of a whole day after it happened.” She says bitterly.

“Don’t Willow. You’re making this so much worse for yourself. You weren’t to know this was to happen while you were away.” I reply. When she doesn’t answer I continue. “Would your Mum want you to blame yourself?”

Willow pulls away from me and sits back down on one of the chairs outside of her Mums’ room. She places her head in her hands and I see tremors shake through her body. I take a seat by her side but I don’t reach out to her.

“That’s if she even remembers who I am.” She whispers. I look at her, shocked that she is thinking in such a dark manner.

“Don’t dwell on that now. The doctor said they aren’t sure how much damage has been done to her brain. The memory loss might only be minimal, no matter what the doctor says. He was preparing you for the worst.” I say, reaching out and rubbing her tense back.

Willow’s head lifts from its position in her hands. Her sad eyes meet mine. “I hate not knowing Andy. I don’t know whether my Mum will ever wake up. I don’t know what kind of life she’s going to have if she does. I don’t know whether the life she will have will be worth living at all or if she’d be better off dead.” She says her voice choked with unshed tears.

Soundlessly, I pull Willow into my arms. Her arms loop around my neck and her head rests against my chest. I feel her body shake with silent tears.