Hatake

23

I dream of drowning.

I dream that everything was all just a genjustu and I'm still not free from the curse.

I wake in a cold sweat.

I rub my neck and look around.

I'm still at Kakashi's apartment.

I get off of the couch and get a glass of water. I sip on it while I wander his place.

I stop and look at the small collection of books.

I then look at a framed photo of him and some students. I smile and place it back on the shelf.

I pull a random book out and start reading it. After a few dozen pages I feel my eyes starting to drift closed.

I wake to the sound of something sizzling in a pan.

I unravel myself from a crunched up position by the bookshelf.

"I was going to move you back to the couch but you were sleeping so peacefully." Kakashi says now seeing I'm awake.

He's standing in the kitchen in a loose shirt and some shorts.  His hair is damp and he's not wearing his mask.

I don't say anything and scrub my eyes. 

"You can take a quick shower before it's ready." He tells me.

"Okay." I say my voice sore.

"It's over there." He says pointing.

I follow his directions and find the shower.

I step in making sure it's not too hot first.

I don't know how long it's been since I've taken a hot shower. I've been mostly rinsing off in the river or washing with a bucket of water.

I get out and wrap up with a towel.

I see a stack of clothes on the counter. He must've put these in here earlier.

I pull them on. We are about the same height so they fit pretty well.

I return to the kitchen and watch as he finishes up cooking.

"Wow." I say trying the food.

"Am I a better chef than Orochimaru?" He asks.

I nod while eating another bite.

"You're a better host too." I add laughing.

"How was he?" He asks.

"Are you...jealous?" I ask.

He always gets a little worked up whenever we talk about him.

He frowns.
"Of what?"

"It's okay to say it. I know I'm pretty great company." I say teasing him.

He takes a big breath and looks down at his plate.

"You're not really mad are you?" I ask.

"You were away for months with those men. I don't know what all you guys did." He says.

I try to stop my smile.

"You really are jealous." I say.

He looks at me and tenses his jaw.

My face hurts trying to not smile.

"You enjoy the thought of me being jealous?" He says.

I bite my lip and stifle my laugh with my hand.

"I see..." he says.

"I can tell you all about it. But just don't get any ideas on dunking my feet in acid. Once was enough." I say.

He doesn't smile. Instead looks at me in a way that my eyes dart down to my plate.

"You're fun to mess with." He says reaching out to touch my hand and finally smiling.

I pout then place my hands on his.

"Are you always cold?" He asks.

"No. Just when I want to hold your hand." I say trying to be sly.

He laughs.

I help him clean up the kitchen.

Once done I ask him,
"So do you have to go do anything today?"

I hope the answer is no.

"Nope." He says smiling.

"Kakashi there's something that I've been meaning to do for a while." I say.

"Yeah?" He says.

"Something I regretted not doing. And that made my heart ache every time I thought about it. And I can't— I can't express in words how much it hurt me when I left you." I say.

His face softens.

"And when I thought... when I thought you were dead. It sent me into a blind rage. I didn't even find out what the last stage was because I had already killed him. I couldn't imagine anything hurting me more than losing someone that I never got to...tell them that I liked them." I say.

His bottom lip shakes before he brings me into an embrace.

"I thought that I would never see you again. I was destroyed. For months I was checking the paper everyday praying that I'd see some hint that you were still alive. I was dismissed from missions because I didn't have any drive. My students nagged me that I wasn't teaching them anything challenging. I missed you so much I actually was willing to give myself up to Orochimaru if it meant that I could be with you." He says.

He pulls me closer, his tears fall on my shoulder.