ARE YOU WORTH IT (intersex)

24

"She's lucky I didn't call the police."

"Mom, please."

"No! No daughter of mine should be anywhere near that kind of lifestyle."

Of course, she could tell. How could I forget that my mom is a raging homophobic narcissist?
She stormed into the apartment, her heels clicking sharply against the wooden floor, a sound that always made me feel small.

"Don't you remember what your daddy did to us?"

"Mom—please."

She collapsed onto the loveseat, her gaze drifting out the window, as if she could escape the reality of my words. "It just isn't right, Stephanie." Her voice was quieter now, almost pleading. She turned to face me, her eyes filled with a mix of sorrow and anger. "All she's gonna do is corrupt you Stephanie so I forbid you from seeing that woman again."

I'm twenty-three and still fold under the pressure of my mother. Ever since Dad left, the weight of her expectations has crushed me. I had to become her caretaker, the responsible one, the perfect daughter. Every mistake felt like a betrayal, every misstep a catastrophe. She made me feel like leaving would destroy her, that my life wasn't mine to live and because of that I nearly didn't accept the scholarship to New York because of her.

—Almost.

"Mom, she's my counselor. She's been helping me catch up on my grades. She tutors and mentors me, that's all." My voice wavered, but I forced myself to maintain eye contact. As I finished speaking, a sharp knock echoed through the small apartment.

We both quickly turned towards the door.

"Aren't you going to get that?" My mom speaks breaking me from my daze

I approached the door, my heart pounding in my chest. As I slowly opened it, the door flew open and Cash barreled in, nearly knocking me off my feet.

"What the fu—"

"Steph, oh my God—please, you have to listen to me." Her hands grabbed my face, her eyes wild, unfocused. I tried to glance back at my mom, but Cash forced me to face her, her grip desperate, frantic.

"Steph, you have to stop seeing her! She kn—"

I pushed her hands away, "Cash! What the hell are you talking about?" I looked at her closely something was wrong. Her pupils were dilated, her movements jerky.

—Is she on drugs?

"They—they aren't good people, Steph." Her words slurred, each one more labored than the last. She was breathing heavily now, her chest rising and falling rapidly. But all I could focus on was how utterly lost she looked. The strong, confident Cash I knew was gone, replaced by someone fragile and broken. And then, as if her strength finally gave out, she collapsed against me, her body trembling.

I just stood there for a minute.

—I don't know what to do.

"Mom, wha- what do I do? " Panic bubbled up inside me as I looked over at my mother, whos face was pale, her hands trembling slightly. She didn't have an answer. She didn't know what to do either.

"Stephanie, you need to call the police." Her voice regained its authority, but I could see the concern in her eyes.

"I can't call the police. The police will not help her." I took matters into my own hands as I reached into Cash's pocket, using her face to unlock her phone. I dialed the most recent contact, praying it was someone who could help—maybe her mother, someone who knew how to deal with this.

After a few rings, a woman answered,

"Cash, honey, I thought I told you—"

"Um, hello?" I cut her off, my voice shaky. "I'm sorry, is this Cash's mother? This is her friend from school my name is Stephanie. Cash seems to be completely out of it. I wanted to call the police, but I'm afraid they won't really help her. She's saying all kinds of crazy things and—"

"Things Like what?" The woman's tone sharpened, concern evident.

"I don't know, I'm not really sure. I couldn't make out much of it."

There was a long, unnerving pause followed by the beep of the call ending. The silence that followed was deafening. I stared at the phone in disbelief,

I looked at Cash, now slumped against me, her breathing shallow. I glanced back at my mom, hoping for some kind of guidance, but she looked as lost as me. For once, she didn't have a command or a criticism ready on her lips. Her eyes were glued to Cash, a mix of disgust and concern flickering across her face And in that moment, I realized that for once, I was on my own, with a decision I'm not sure if I'm capable of making on my own.

Suddenly, Cash stirred, her fingers clinging weakly to my arm. "she's watching Steph..." Her voice was barely a whisper, but the urgency in her tone sent a shiver down my spine.

"Who's watching, Cash?" I leaned in closer, trying to catch her words as they faded into incoherence. But she only mumbled something unintelligible, her eyes fluttering shut as she sagged further into my arms.

"Stephanie, she can't stay here. We need to get her help soon." My mom spoke

"I know," I whispered, more to myself than to her. But what kind of help did Cash need? And who could I trust to actually help her? My thoughts raced, trying to piece together the fragments of Cash's warnings.

—I could call Ms jones.

I gently lowered Cash onto the foot of my bed , brushing her hair from her face. She looked so vulnerable, so unlike the flirty girl I'd known. I thought she was sober—clean?

— could someone have done this to her?

"Cash...Who did this to you." I let my thoughts slip

She opened her mouth to say something. I quickly put my ear to her mouth to listen "-jones.." she spoke in a very low tone that only I could hear. I quickly jerked back and stood up,  I could feel my mom's eyes on me, as she waited for me to make a decision.

—Ms jones? But Why would she do this to her? None of this makes any sense, but I couldn't shake the feeling that Cash's ramblings weren't just the product of a drugged mind. There was something more—something dark and dangerous lurking beneath her words. instant flashes of Ms Jones and my weekend with her flooded my mind— I began to think more...  the vague story about her past and what she's been through... and the Polaroids I saw..

—is there more that I don't know about this woman?

I quickly shut my eyes and pushed my suspicions aside.

Finally, I looked at my mom. "I think we need to take her to a hospital. But not the police. I don't trust them to handle this right."

My mom hesitated, clearly uncomfortable with the idea of keeping the authorities out of it. But she nodded slowly, a rare sign of agreement.

. I bent down to lift Cash, but she suddenly grabbed my arm with surprising strength. Her eyes flew open, wild and terrified. "Please, don't let her..."

"I won't," I promised, my voice steady despite the overwhelming feeling of uncertainty. "I swear."

as we prepared to leave, I couldn't shake the feeling that for some reason we were already too late. That Whatever Cash is running from—it's coming for me too.

Talk to me. What do you guys think?

Xoxo