ARE YOU WORTH IT (intersex)

26

The bathroom's quiet, broken only by the distant sound of the school's loud hallways. Her words hung in the air between us, a fragile thread of truth tangled with secrets I wasn't sure I wanted to unravel. But underneath it all, the warning bells in my head would never stop ringing.

"You keep saying that, : to trust you." I managed to say, my voice low, "but it's not enough. I can't keep doing this if I don't know what's real and what's not."

"Steph, I'm just trying to protect you," she said,

"From what?" I asked, exasperation creeping into my voice. "You can't just say stuff like that and expect me to drop it. I need to understand what's going on here, with you, with Cash—."

She took a deep breath, her gaze intense as she looked at me. "There are things about my past—things that could hurt you if you knew them. The people involved, the choices I made... It's not something you should be tangled up in."

Her words hit me like a punch to the gut. She was asking me to trust her blindly, to accept that whatever dark history she carried was better left buried. But how could I? How could I trust someone who was hiding so much?

"What? Can you please for once stop speaking in fucking riddles. You're a counselor! At a university. Your married and You sleep with students you shouldn't be sleeping with and you have a-" I paused trying to articulate myself the best way I could "look all I'm trying to say is whatever it is that you think would scare me away isn't. After everything I've endured these past couple of months don't you think I would've been run off."

"You don't get it Stephanie, I'm not scared that you might run off, to be completely honest I wished you did. I'm just scared you'll get hurt..." She brushed her hair behind her ears.

—hurt? From what? Most importantly she's scared?

She began again "and if you must know I should have never been a counselor. I shouldn't be anywhere but prison or somewhere dead right now." My eyes widened. —How could she say something like that? I opened my mouth to speak but she spoke first. "My wife- she.." she paused seeming to choke on her words. "She owns me. Back then I only had two choices: rot away in a cell or pay my debt." She finally broke away from me. "As you can see I chose to pay up."

My heart pounded in my chest as I tried to process what she had just confessed. The image of her that I had been holding onto—the composed, controlled, and mysterious woman who had somehow charmed me—was starting to crumble, revealing cracks I never anticipated.

"owns you?" my voice shaky. The phrase felt foreign, heavy with implications I wasn't ready to grasp. The idea that someone could have such control over another person, so much power? especially over someone like HER, made my stomach twist with unease.

She nodded, her eyes fixed on a point somewhere behind me, distant and unreadable. "Vivian," she whispered, almost as if saying her name would summon her, "She's not just some woman I fell in love with and chose to marry. it's not just some bad marriage Steph. It's a nightmare I can't wake up from."

I struggled to find the right words, anything that could make sense of this revelation. "But... why- why don't you just leave? Disappear? There must be a way out. There's always a way out."

She let out a bitter laugh, shaking her head. "You don't understand.—she's ruthless! She knows things, does things, that you can't even imagine. Leaving isn't an option especially Not after what I've done." The fear in her voice, the genuine fear, was something I hadn't heard before.

"What... what did you do?" I asked.

Her gaze finally met mine, her dark eyes filled with regret. "I made a mistake. A terrible mistake that cost someone their life. Someone very dear to Vivian... she somehow managed to cover it up, and in return, I became hers. It's as simple as that."

The room seemed to tilt as her words sunk in. A life lost?. A cover-up?. And now, this woman who had become such a confusing fixture in my life was admitting to something so dark, that it made my skin crawl. "Someone died? Who—"

"I can't tell you that," she cut me off, her tone final. "It's safer for you not to know. Just trust me on that."

Safe? The word felt hollow, meaningless after everything she just revealed. How could anything about this situation be safe?

"What about Cash?" I asked, needing to shift the conversation, to focus on something else before the weight of her confession crushed me. "What does she have to do with this?"

Her expression darkened, a shadow passing over her features. "I have no idea. I don't think cash is involved with anything other than being young and stupid. You said it yourself she was completely out of it."

My frustration grew, "But She's been different, distant. And now with everything you're telling me, I can't help but think it's all connected."

She sighed, rubbing her temples as if trying to ease a growing headache. "Connected how?" Her voice rises "I don't know what you want me to say, Steph. Cash seems reckless, and she's clearly fallen into something that's way over her head. But I don't think it's connected to anything that's going on with me and Vivian."

Thought I'd flood you guys with chapters.. next one coming in a couple hours? Maybe? Idk..

Xoxo