God and I

Truth

When the dust settles
With dusk
The wind leaves
With a pocket full of dreams
Dreams You have given me
And I have destroyed
As I always destroy it all
So I stand outside
Looking in through a window
As the night approaches
With fear

Fear.
I fear a lot
I fear everything
I fear I was wrong
Or I am not listening
I fear pain
I fear sorrow
I fear failure
I fear love
I fear loneliness
But I fear above all
You have abandoned me

You are all I have
No doubt all I need
Yet I am indeed of a friend
I long to get on my knees
Yet I am becoming weary of prayer
With age
I hope You will have mercy
On Your faithless child
For Your heart is vast
And endless

I pray I will not repeat
This prayer
That I will learn
From my mistakes
Truth be told
You know me and I know me
This prayer might be in vain
But I stand outside
In the dark and it is cold
Looking in through the window
Begging for forgiveness
Hoping You have not
Abandoned me
For though I appear unbreakable
And in control
You and I know
I am not as strong
As I pretend to be