training wheels. // evan 'buck' buckley

xxi. closer than usual

the evening sun cast a golden glow over the 118 firehouse as the crew gathered for a group outing. the restaurant they chose was a cozy, dimly lit place known for its eclectic decor and comfort food. it was a chance for everyone to unwind after a week of intense calls and the pressures of our jobs. i arrived a bit early, greeted warmly by the familiar faces of the 118 team as they trickled in.

i took a seat at a corner table, my eyes scanning the room as i waited for everyone else to arrive. i was relieved to escape the high-stress environment of the firehouse for a bit, though my thoughts kept drifting to buck. his playful remarks had begun to feel heavier, more laden with meaning than i was comfortable with. but for tonight, i pushed those thoughts aside, determined to enjoy myself.

as the restaurant filled up with the team, the conversation quickly became lively. chimney and hen immediately fell into their usual banter, with chimney boasting about his latest culinary creation and hen teasing him about his inability to keep up with her medical knowledge. i found myself laughing along with everyone, grateful for the distraction.

buck, as usual, was the last to arrive, bursting into the restaurant with his characteristic energy. he scanned the room and caught my eye, offering a wave and a grin before sliding into the seat next to me. as he did, he threw an arm casually over the back of my chair, an action that was both familiar and charged.

“so, charlie,” buck began, leaning in with a playful glint in his eye, “how’s my best friend doing today?”

i forced a laugh, trying to keep my tone light despite the tension i felt building. “i’m good, thanks. just trying to stay out of trouble, you know.”

buck’s grin widened. “oh, i’m sure you’re always on the straight and narrow. but if you ever need help staying out of trouble, you know who to call.”

i raised an eyebrow, trying to ignore the heat rising in my cheeks. “i think i can handle it. but thanks for the offer.”

BUCK’S remarks, though playful on the surface, were starting to feel like a game of cat and mouse. he continued with his subtle jabs, each remark laced with a hint of flirtation. the way he looked at me, with that devilish smirk, made my heart race. it was clear to everyone at the table that there was more to our interactions than met the eye, but no one said anything. instead, they exchanged knowing glances, clearly intrigued by the undercurrent of our conversation.

as the evening progressed, the group began discussing their recent emergency calls. buck animatedly recounted a particularly intense rescue, his hands gesturing as he described the action. i had been trying to keep up with the conversation, but found myself distracted by buck’s focused gaze. he seemed to be speaking directly to me, as if trying to draw me into his story in a more personal way.

“you know,” buck said, glancing at charlie, “there was this one time i had to really pull through for someone. it’s all about knowing when to step up and when to let someone else handle things.”

my smile faltered. the comment seemed too personal, too pointed. it felt like a direct challenge, a way of saying something that was more about them than about the call he was recounting. i became noticeably quieter, my laughter dying down as i retreated into myself.

eddie, noticing the shift, gave buck a sideways glance. “hey, buck, maybe ease up a bit. we’re supposed to be having a good time.”

buck’s smile faltered as he took in my subdued demeanor. he reached out, trying to lighten the mood with a more genuine tone. “hey, charlie, you good? i didn’t mean to make things awkward.”

i nodded, forcing a smile. “yeah, i’m fine. just… not in the mood for heavy talk tonight.”

buck looked at me with concern, feeling the weight of the moment. he tried to shift the conversation, but the tension lingered. the others, sensing the shift, tried to fill the gap with lighter topics, but the air was thick with unspoken words and unresolved feelings.