Strangers in the night

30

It had been a week. It had been a week since she had said something that wasn't professional to her best friend. She was going crazy. She was completely miserable. And now she was driving to his trailer, which was probably insane. She was going to someone's house that she wasn't even talking to her. But she had a feeling he needed her. So she was going. Now.

She had just scrubbed out of her own surgery when she overheard a couple of scrub nurses talking about it. About the four year old whose parents had beaten him so badly he had needed immediate brain surgery. About the little boy bleeding out on the table, while Derek rushed to save him. Derek hated losing kids. He hated operating on them, but he especially hated losing them.

And he had lost one today. And suddenly it hadn't mattered that they had kissed on New Years and she hadn't said a word to him since. He was hurting, her Derek was hurting and she had to be there. Even if she had no idea what to say, she just needed to be there for him. Because losing a kid that could have been perfectly healthy if he didn't have crap parents, it would be killing him.

She could put aside everything. She could put aside the weirdness for this. He needed her, and she couldn't just sit at her apartment with Pip tonight when she knew he would be moping at home, drinking and fishing and beating himself up about losing a patient who apparently hadn't had much of a chance from the second he had come in. Derek needed her, and that was enough for her and Pip.

She pulled up to his trailer and felt her heart tighten as she saw him immediately, sitting on his dock, staring out into the water and looking miserable. She couldn't even see his face but she could just tell, he was hurting and it was good she was here. For now they could pretend the kiss hadn't happened and maybe just be them or whatever else he needed right now.

She climbed out of her car, Pip jumping out eagerly after her before she reached for the bottle of scotch sitting on the passenger seat. Jake sat up from his spot by Derek and immediately started barking excitedly, though Derek didn't turn at all. "Hey, Jake," she murmured, scratching behind the dog's long ears. "Hey, boy."

"Meredith..." she heard Derek murmur even though he didn't turn to look at her.

"Hey, Der," she whispered, sitting down next to him.

"You're here," he breathed.

"I'm here," she murmured, her eyes catching the two empty beer bottles next to him. "I'm here, Derek."

"I didn't think you would be," he sighed.

"I've...I've been a really bad friend," she breathed, reaching and squeezing his hand. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be," he murmured. "I get....things have been a mess."

"They have been," she sighed. "But I'm here."

"Thanks," he nodded slowly.

"I brought scotch. And Pip."

"Thanks," he sighed. "You brought you."

"I brought me."

"Which is better than the scotch or Pip," he murmured, a smile tugging at his mouth slightly.

"Nothing's better than Pip," she giggled slightly.

"You are."

"Der," she breathed, squeezing his hand tightly as he stared out at the water.

"He was four," Derek breathed.

"I know," she whispered, her other hand moving to gently play with the curls at the nape of his neck.

"Who could do that to a four year old? He's four and they beat him to the point of major brain damage. Four."

"They...I don't know, Der," she sighed, tears pricking her eyes. "I don't know."