As Ouahib arrives in town , carrying the weight of a family that has weathered hardships, including parental separation, and the lingering echoes of a once vibrant home, he embarks on a new beginning, yearning for a different chapter.
In contrast...
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After Dinner we head home, while my heart already starts pounding and my face feels hot.
"Are you by chance thinking about later?" I hear his teasing voice, while one of his hands is resting on my thigh and the other is effortlessly maneuvering the steering wheel and bringing the car to turn to the main street.
My cheeks feel even hotter and his hand roaming across my thigh isn't helping either.
"OUAHIB!" I whine as I watch him smirking. "Don't do this, I'm already so anxious!" I blurt out not knowing that I just confessed my biggest concern.
The car comes to a halt, while silence envelops us. He stops the engine and then turns around facing me while I don't dare to look his way.
I feel his hand coming toward my side to open the seatbelt and in the next second I'm seated on his lap.
I keep my eyes down, not daring to look him in the eyes. "Aaliyah look me in the eyes." I hear his voice. It has a hint of anger and fear in it.
I still don't have the courage to look up to him, so he takes the matter into his hands and makes me look at him by grabbing my chin gently and making me look up.
"Liyati, are you regretting our first night?" He asks carefully, as if not wanting to ask the question or rather scared of the answer.
I can't hold back the shiver that runs down my spine at the flashback of the night after our reception.
It was our first time and I don't regret it. At all. "Aaliyah, I'm sorry if you weren't ready-" He starts but I cut him off, because it's not true.
"No! It's not like that. It's just- I don't think I'm enough for you. I don't think I'm able to give you what you want. I'm not sure if what I did was right. That's why I'm anxious. I don't know and I don't have experience obviously, but I just feel like it's not enough what we were taught." By the end of my sentence I dare to look him in the eyes, which are shining with tears. My rational side is mocking me, as the jerk has really made me so insecure taht I'm questioning such silly matters. He really got into my head and I hate him for that. I despise his existence.
"Oh my baby!" My husband cooes and wraps me in his arms bringing me closer to his chest. Thankfully, because the steering wheel was boring into my back.
"You did amazing! I hope you know it was my first time too. I also didn't have experience, as you call it!" He laughs and his smile relaxes the environment.
"I just don't know what to do... That night I just let you dominate because I had no clue what to do and let my body react to yours." I admit feeling shy again. "The good news is that we have our whole lives to practice!" He jokes and I hit his shoulder.
I feel the anxiety fading away but it's being replaced by guilt, again. The topic which I'm not daring to bring up.
I'm distracted by Ouahib's hot breath who happens to be a few inches away from kissing me. I smile and lean in closer attaching our lips into a quick kiss.
