Between the desks

Chapter 59

Amren's POV

When I woke up that morning, I was surprised to feel... okay. It was a strange kind of calm, almost unsettling, given the emotional wreckage of the past few days. Maybe it was the numbness that had settled in, dulling the sharp edges of everything that had happened. Or maybe it was Lily. She had stayed with me through the night, grounding me when everything felt like it was spinning out of control.

She had made breakfast—toast, scrambled eggs, and some fresh coffee. It was simple, but it was exactly what I needed. We sat at the kitchen table, the soft morning light filtering through the window, and talked about everything again—Jess, the betrayal, the pregnancy. My emotions felt drained, like I had cried out everything I could the night before, leaving me hollow and exhausted.

"You're going to be okay," Lily said, her voice gentle but firm, cutting through my haze. "Even though it feels like everything's crashing down, I promise you, you'll get through this."

I stared down at my coffee, swirling it around in my cup, still feeling that lingering numbness. "How do you know that?" I asked, my voice small, fragile. I didn't know how I was supposed to be okay when everything inside me still felt broken.

Lily leaned forward, her eyes soft but full of determination. "Because I know you, Am. You're strong. You've been through hell before, and you've come out of it every time. This... this is just another thing you'll survive. I know you can get through it too." She reached across the table, taking my hand in hers, squeezing it tightly.

Her words were comforting, but I wasn't sure if I believed them yet. Still, I let her hug me, and for the first time in days, I let myself believe—just a little—that maybe she was right.

By 6 p.m., we had decided that tonight was the night to let loose, to drown out the pain and forget everything for a while. I wanted to forget Jess—forget that she cheated on me, that she was pregnant, that she had shattered my heart with a few simple, cruel words. I wanted to forget about college, about the suffocating pressure of it all, about Professor Olsen.

We opened the first bottle of wine like it was water, downing glass after glass. By 8 p.m., we were two bottles in, the alcohol already blurring the edges of my thoughts, making everything feel softer, more distant. It was exactly what I needed.

We got ready with the kind of reckless energy that only comes with trying to erase your problems through sheer force of will. I slipped into my favorite grey trousers, the ones that hugged my hips perfectly, with the matching waistcoat. The black boots I paired with it gave me that strong, masculine vibe I loved—especially tonight. Tonight was about feeling powerful, in control. No more dressing the way Jess liked. Fuck Jess. I wasn't dressing for her anymore. I was dressing for me.

I tied my hair back in a tight bun, my makeup clean and minimal, with just enough eyeliner to make my eyes pop. I spritzed on my favorite perfume—vanilla with just a hint of citrus—and let it mix with the faint smell of the cigarette I lit as I leaned against the window, watching the city come to life as the sun set. The smoke curled lazily around me, adding to the intoxicating mix of scents.

Lily emerged from the bathroom, looking stunning as always. She had on a sleek black blazer, the oversized fit falling just right over her tiny dress. The pumps she wore made her legs look like they went on forever, and when she turned, her ass looked so good it was almost criminal. We both knew we weren't leaving this club alone tonight.

"You look hot as hell," I told her, smirking as I took another drag of my cigarette.

"Damn right I do," she grinned, striking a playful pose. "But you, Am? You're gonna turn some heads tonight. Just wait."

By 10 p.m., we were in the heart of the city's club scene, the air buzzing with life. The streets were filled with people, their laughter and shouts mixing with the thumping bass from the surrounding clubs. The energy was electric, and I could feel it seeping into my bones as we walked down the busy street.

We headed straight for Safe, our favorite spot. It was the place where I'd first met Jess, where so many nights of our relationship had started and ended. A part of me wondered if I'd see her tonight. Or maybe... maybe I'd see Professor Olsen. I quickly shoved the thought away, not wanting to go down that road.

As we walked in, heads turned our way. The thrill of it sent a small jolt through me. I liked it—the attention, the power. Tonight, I wasn't going to be the broken-hearted girl crying over a cheating ex. Tonight, I was going to be someone else entirely.

We made our way to the bar, ordering our usual drinks. I went for my favorite—amaretto and cola zero—while Lily stuck to her classic choice of wine. Always wine. She never wavered from that, no matter where we were. I, on the other hand, preferred something with more depth, something that matched the mood I was in.

We downed our drinks quickly, the alcohol adding to the buzz already thrumming through me. The music was loud, the bass vibrating through the floor, through my body. It was still early, but I could feel the night stretching out before us, full of possibility.

The night was young, and so were we. And for the first time in days, I felt like maybe I could outrun the pain. Just for a little while.