Between the desks

Chapter 69

Amren's POV

"Class dismissed," Professor Olsen announced, her voice icy and firm. She had handled the disagreement well, but I could feel the tension still lingering in the air. I understood why she was so cold; I would be furious if someone started shouting at me in front of a class. Still, she maintained her composure and grace, handling the situation like a queen.

Lily and I started to walk toward the door, but suddenly, Professor Olsen's voice cut through the chatter like a knife. "Amren! Can I have a moment with you, please?"

"Girl, I told you!" Lily whispered excitedly, her eyes wide with anticipation. "See you after!" She waved and walked out, leaving me alone with the professor.

I turned around and slowly made my way back to Professor Olsen. As the last student closed the door behind them, the room felt charged with an unusual energy. "What did you want to talk about, Professor?" I broke the silence, my heart pounding in my chest.

She looked at me intently, her expression serious yet softening. "I read your essay," she said, giving me a reassuring nod. "It was really good, Amren."

I was taken aback. "Thank you! I'm glad you liked it," I replied, trying to keep my tone steady. Nervousness bubbled beneath my surface, but I couldn't help but feel a spark of pride at her compliment.

"Liked it? I was a bit moved by it, if I'm honest," she admitted, her voice lowering slightly. I let out a breath I didn't realize I was holding.

"You were?" I asked, astonished. I couldn't believe that she found my work impactful. It felt surreal to hear that my words had reached her in some way.

"Yes, I'm very impressed with how you approached the topic," she continued, her praise washing over me. I blushed and looked down, unable to meet her gaze. How could talking to her affect me so profoundly?

"But I have one question for you," she said, her voice turning serious, as if she was about to ask me something monumental.

"What is your question, Professor?" I replied, now feeling even more anxious.

"Is it something you have experienced?" Her tone was soft yet eager, drawing me in.

"Yes," I blurted out, my voice barely more than a whisper. I locked eyes with her, feeling a rush of adrenaline. This was my moment. I had to tell her what I felt. I could sense something shift in her expression, her eyes widening slightly as she licked her lips, almost as if she was preparing to say something important.

And then it spilled out of me before I could stop myself. "You are my forbidden love." I instantly pressed my hand against my mouth, regretting my words as soon as they left my lips. I wanted this, but it felt so awkward to say it out loud.

Professor Olsen cleared her throat, looking taken aback. "I'm so sorry, that just slipped out. I've wanted to tell you that since our first encounter," I found myself rambling, feeling flustered and exposed.

Her eyes widened even more, revealing a flicker of uncertainty. "Amren, I—" she started, but it was clear that she was already putting up walls.

"Please, just hear me out!" I urged, desperation creeping into my voice. "I know it sounds dramatic, but there's this special connection between us! When you look at me, it feels like everything else disappears, and it's just you and me."

"Amren, this isn't—" she began, shaking her head slightly, a clear sign that she was trying to distance herself from my words.

"No, just listen!" I interrupted again, my heart racing. "It's not just admiration; it's something real! When you talk, it feels magical, and I can't help but feel drawn to you. I feel so alive when I'm near you!"

"I appreciate your feelings," she replied, her voice more measured now, but I could hear a tinge of caution. "But I need you to understand that I don't feel the same way."

My heart sank as her words pierced through my hope. "How can you be so certain? I know there's chemistry between us! I can't be the only one feeling this!"

"Amren," she said, her voice steady but firm, "I care about you as a student. I want you to do well in your studies. But you're young, and this feeling you have might just be a crush. It's easy to confuse those feelings."

"But what if it's more than just a crush?" I insisted, my hands trembling slightly. "What if it's something deeper? We can't just ignore this! I can't believe I'm the only one who feels this way!"

For a moment, her expression softened, and I could see the conflict playing out in her eyes. "You're a brilliant student with a lot of potential. I want to support you, but we can't have this kind of relationship. It wouldn't be right."

"Why not?" I asked, frustration bubbling up within me. "Why can't we explore this? It doesn't have to be so black and white! I know there's something between us, and I refuse to believe it's all in my head!"

"Amren, please." Her voice was softer now, but it only made me want to fight harder. "This isn't just about you and me. There are rules for a reason. I have a responsibility to uphold, both as your teacher and as a professional."

I shook my head, my heart racing with a mix of defiance and longing. "But can't you see? It's not just about your responsibility. It's something more! You can't tell me you don't feel anything! You can't just push this aside!"

"I'm not ignoring it!" she shot back, her frustration becoming evident. "But I need you to understand that my feelings don't match yours. I don't feel the same way."

The weight of her words hit me like a punch to the gut, and I felt my heart plummet. "But what if you're wrong? What if this could be something amazing? We could explore it together—"

"Amren," she interrupted, her voice softening but still firm, "this isn't the right path for us. I want what's best for you, and right now, this isn't it."

I searched her eyes, desperately hoping to find a glimmer of reciprocation. But all I saw was a resolute barrier. "I just want you to think about it," I said quietly, my voice trembling. "I want you to consider what we could have."

"Amren..." she began, but I cut her off.

"Please, just think about it. I can't be the only one who feels this connection, can I?" I pleaded, my heart pounding with a mix of hope and dread.

She hesitated, and for a fleeting moment, I thought I might have cracked her defenses. But then she stepped back, creating physical distance between us once again. "I need you to focus on your studies, not on me. That's where your energy should go."

As she turned away, I felt a crushing wave of despair wash over me. I knew that while she wasn't admitting her feelings for me, I still held onto the belief that deep down, she might feel something too. But for now, all I had was the aching void in my chest, a longing for what could never be.

"I should go," I murmured, my heart shattered. The weight of disappointment pressed down on me. "See you in class tomorrow."

"See you tomorrow, Amren," she replied softly, a hint of sorrow lacing her words. I left the class room and closed the door behind me, emotions roaring through me like a tempest, leaving me feeling both lost and hollow.