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MY PURPOSE - JOHN B ROUTLEDGE

MY PURPOSE - JOHN B ROUTLEDGE

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CHAPTER FIVE - PRAYERS

John B refused to believe this was happening. He didn't just watch Eleanor, the girl who meant the world to him, take her final breath. He didn't. He couldn't have.

He knelt down beside her, the world around him fading into a blur of muffled sounds and disjointed colours. The pulsating ache in his chest was almost unbearable as he cradled her head in his trembling hands, her once-vibrant face now waxen and ghostly in the dim light.

The doctor was scrambling around the room trying to find his medical bag to start CPR or she wasn't going to make it.

"Do you know CPR?" He quickly asked.

John B shook his head.

"That's a sternum. Push on it till I tell you to stop. And try not to break her ribs"

"Come on, El" He whispered, his voice cracking under the weight of despair as he counted each compression, desperate to summon the spark he knew was still inside her.

Doctor Nygard stopped him, placing the mouthpiece over Eleanor's lips and pumped the full bag twice "Okay...go again"

John B continued CPR. Then he stopped and Dr. Nygard stepped in to give her two breaths. Just like that, the two men were rotating back and forth but Eleanor showed no signs of life.

With every push down onto her sternum, he felt her ribs give away beneath his hands - a sickening sound that the punctured the silence around them.

"You gotta stay with me, El. Stay with me" The boy pleaded, his mind racing through memories - her smile that could light up the night sky, the way she stood up for the people she loved, the warmth of her hand in his. Each thought was a stab, a reminder of everything he stood to lose.

He didn't even tell get to tell her he loved her too before she slipped away.

Time stretched, warping reality, as he continued his best efforts of saving her. But the seconds turned into minutes, and soon the doctor stopped what he was doing and put the bag down.

"She's lost too much blood, kid. I'm sorry. I'll leave you with her" He patted him on the shoulder, leaving to his office with his liquor.

John B wasn't taking no for an answer so he grabbed the bag and took on both roles. Pumping air into her lungs, he went back to CPR. Pressing his hands against her chest, feeling the weight of her fragile body beneath him, a weight that felt impossibly heavy. He pumped with intention, giving it all he had, wishing and praying her heart to beat again.

One... two... three...

He pushed down harder. Her body swayed from side to side like she was a rag doll. No sign of life. All John B wanted was to see those brown eyes again.

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